Rodri - The 2024 Ballon d'Or Winner! (Pg 131)

Jilted Junior by Jilted Junior

I'm not going out on a plane
To collect my trophy
Instead I am staying at home
To watch Rodri on the telly

"What's this Cup?" He asked me
"Ballon d' or" i replied
"Not that Cup that Rodri's"
"Yeah but it's my cup" i cried

I was so upset
That i cried all the way to the Bernabau
And when i got there
There was Rodri
Standing at the bus stop
And guess what was with him?
Yeah the trophy
And they were both laughing at me

Oh Journos are cruel and heartless
To not vote for me but Rodri
Just coz he's a better player than me
Just coz he's cool and trendy
But I know that's my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

Rodri's got my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

I'm so upset
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
 
Champions League (player of the tournament)
La Liga
Supercopa de España
26 goals
11 assists
Lost 3 games all season

vs

European Championship (player of the tournament)
Premier League
Club World Cup (player of the tournament)
UEFA Super Cup
12 goals
14 assists
Lost one game all season

Had forgotten that Rodri was player of the Club World Cup as well. Add to that that he was also player of the CL 22/23 and Nations League 22/23. It's hardly injustice to think he's been the best player in the world since the start of 22/23, for he's been recognized as the best player in 4 non-domestic competitions in that time and won a 4th consecutive title in the most difficult league in the world, breaking an all-time record in England.
 
Last edited:
Seems to have only triggered one or two rags fans this.

Dippers fans seem to agree with the decision, but mainly down to Vinicius beating them in a CL final a few years ago probably
 
Jilted Junior by Jilted Junior

I'm not going out on a plane
To collect my trophy
Instead I am staying at home
To watch Rodri on the telly

"What's this Cup?" He asked me
"Ballon d' or" i replied
"Not that Cup that Rodri's"
"Yeah but it's my cup" i cried

I was so upset
That i cried all the way to the Bernabau
And when i got there
There was Rodri
Standing at the bus stop
And guess what was with him?
Yeah the trophy
And they were both laughing at me

Oh Journos are cruel and heartless
To not vote for me but Rodri
Just coz he's a better player than me
Just coz he's cool and trendy
But I know that's my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

Rodri's got my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

I'm so upset
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
GIFs that keep on giving - All You Need Is Morrissey
 
Jilted Junior by Jilted Junior

I'm not going out on a plane
To collect my trophy
Instead I am staying at home
To watch Rodri on the telly

"What's this Cup?" He asked me
"Ballon d' or" i replied
"Not that Cup that Rodri's"
"Yeah but it's my cup" i cried

I was so upset
That i cried all the way to the Bernabau
And when i got there
There was Rodri
Standing at the bus stop
And guess what was with him?
Yeah the trophy
And they were both laughing at me

Oh Journos are cruel and heartless
To not vote for me but Rodri
Just coz he's a better player than me
Just coz he's cool and trendy
But I know that's my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

Rodri's got my trophy
Rodri's got my trophy

I'm so upset
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
Yeah yeah, it's not fair
Brilliant, I salute you..!

This is more than the simple pastiche it first appears to be! Nay, it's very lyricism reflects the deep, plangent sobbing of Vinicius and his band of followers after the unspeakable cruelty visited upon him/them at the Ballon D'Or ceremony when Vinicius was denied his true inheritance, his manifest destiny!

Plangent, indeed.. I suggested a few days ago, Vinicius's pain and hurt could only be understood by channelling the feelings of 'Just William's' friend Violet Elizabeth Bott whenever things didn't go her way.. 'I'll scweam and scweam until I make mythelf thick!'

However, your offering is even more right on the button! John Shuttleworth, Jilted John and Graham Fellowes would salute you too!
 

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