After a comprehensive assessment, on manchester united striker wayne rooney's arm, by the medical team at carrington this morning, it has been concluded, that he has suffered a very badly bruised forearm, due to Wigan midfielder James Mccarthy, thrusting the back of his head into it, during the premier league match at the DW stadium on saturday.
Referee mark clattenburg, has informed sir alex, via his private football Association hotline, he will "gladly take the stand, or indeed a bullet for him". Another potential key witness is Wigan owner Dave Wheelan, who was quoted at the time of the incident as saying "what's that jock **** mccarthy doing?" While also in conversation with Roberto Martinez after the match Mr Wheelan has also been quoted as saying "if wayne's injured for the chelsea match, drop that useless thug and fine him a months wages".