Unburdened as I am from the iconic influence this record had 54 years ago, I feel I can be very objective. And I think this record is slow and boring and kind of stupid. Influential? It’s unmistakeable. The Halloween-esque aura may be KISS-like in what is was supposed to convey rather than real, but that’s fine — and if it was new at the time, more power to them. But the endless blues solos? The insipid lyrics? The tempos mired in the mud? Ozzy with absolutely no sense of humo(u)r? Is this enjoyable or just heavy? To me it’s just heavy — and heavy means lugubrious, not impactful. Why do I like “Paranoid”? Because the BPMs are at least 150. Hell, they’re at least 50! It’s light on its feet. As with Metallica whose big fat hits made them worth it as a novelty, so goes Black Sabbath — here and there they hit me in the gut, just not on this record. Blues played loudly and competently and occasionally innovatively is fine. But I walk away unable (maybe more like unwilling) to get anything out of a single song. And while their sound is their own, it’s as comforting as the potholes I know will show up on San Francisco streets every February, meaning I endure it begrudgingly. So I won’t deny the accomplishment of something new at the time nor the influence on countless bands. But, simply put, I don’t have any desire to hear this again. Especially when I can hear “I Don’t Know” or “Over The Mountain” and chuckle (either with or at Ozzy) and marvel at the spectacular talent Randy Rhoads was.
4/10. I debated giving an extra point for one of the great band names of all time. But this record put me in a foul mood, so they get nothing. Sorry all.