The thin line of wedding invitations

[Pigeonho]

Good morning, Blues.

Out of those who have been married or like me, are planning one at the moment, where was that line drawn, (if at all), where you decide who comes and who doesn't?

Mrs P has a big family whereas there aren't many of us. Because she has so many aunts, uncles and cousins we said we were going to draw the line at immediate family and her nana, (my grandparents are long gone). I'm thinking now whether to invite my aunt and uncle from my mums side so it balances it out a bit and because they are the only bit of close family I have after my immediate family, but that then creates a problem of not being able to invite their daughters, (my cousins), as another reason we are keeping it low-key is the cost of it all. How the fuck do you invite an aunty and uncle but not a cousin? If I do then invite those cousins, she will want to invite hers and there's fucking hundreds of them. Not getting hitched until next year but.....

Agggggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

Only invite those who present a serious chance of including you in their will!

 

[ifiwasarichfan]

I cant remember.

I made the wise decision and let them all get on with it on both occasions. I married the first Mrs Richfan 30 years ago today actually.

 

[The Flash]

Myself and Mrs Flash tied the knot last month Pige. We kept it to immediate family and close friends for the ceremony and day do. Aunts and uncles came to that etc. cousins were invited to the evening bash (I have little or no contact with my cousins in my day to day life and we never socialise, but I've always been close to my aunts and uncles) and that helped keep costs down, whilst keeping everyone sweet.

Dunno how you're planning your day but the above arrangement worked for us.

How many of the claims team from Esure are you inviting?

 

[Pigeonho]

Myself and Mrs Flash tied the knot last month Pige. We kept it to immediate family and close friends for the ceremony and day do. Aunts and uncles came to that etc. cousins were invited to the evening bash (I have little or no contact with my cousins in my day to day life and we never socialise, but I've always been close to my aunts and uncles) and that helped keep costs down, whilst keeping everyone sweet.

Dunno how you're planning your day but the above arrangement worked for us.

How many of the claims team from Esure are you inviting?

They're best men and maids of honour!

 

[flb]

Good morning, Blues.

Out of those who have been married or like me, are planning one at the moment, where was that line drawn, (if at all), where you decide who comes and who doesn't?

Mrs P has a big family whereas there aren't many of us. Because she has so many aunts, uncles and cousins we said we were going to draw the line at immediate family and her nana, (my grandparents are long gone). I'm thinking now whether to invite my aunt and uncle from my mums side so it balances it out a bit and because they are the only bit of close family I have after my immediate family, but that then creates a problem of not being able to invite their daughters, (my cousins), as another reason we are keeping it low-key is the cost of it all. How the fuck do you invite an aunty and uncle but not a cousin? If I do then invite those cousins, she will want to invite hers and there's fucking hundreds of them. Not getting hitched until next year but.....

Agggggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!

wouldn't bother mate, you'll probably get divorced in the next 5 years anyway, why spend 10 grand on other people to get pissed at your expense?

None of them give a shit about you and will shower you with 20 pound next and m&s vouchers after youve paid 30 pound a head to get them pissed and eat your sausage rolls and cheddar cheese and pineapple on a stick.

 

[denislawsbackheel]

Bugger off to Bali.
Get married on a beach.
Tell everyone about it when you come home.

 

[blue81]

I only go if I get invited to the full do- don't just invite me to the night to boost the numbers. I f****g hate weddings anyway so I'm always pretty happy when I miss 'the cut'

 

[Chris in London]

Cost is a big factor obviously, but when you start picking and choosing some family members to go and some not, some for the evening do and others for the full monty, you are storing up difficulties one way or another for the future. If cousins go on one side of the family but not the other, one side of the family will sympathise that you have four cousins and she has three hundred and twelve, but the other side of the family will not.

My two penn'orth FWIW, it's the quality of the relationship that counts, not the numbers on either side of the church aisle. If you want your parents' brothers and sisters and their children to come, it's not unreasonable for Mrs P to want the same. If Mrs P isn't that fussed, maybe you do draw the line somewhere but I'm guessing that the reason for this thread is that it's creating friction to a greater or lesser extent. If it is, and you dig your heels in, it may be an issue for you for a very long time to come.

If I were you, I'd either get your chequebook out and buy her entire family dinner, or you need to start making economies with what you had otherwise planned. Otherwise, there might come a point when you sorely wish you had done for one reason or another.

Besides, she's marrying you Pige. The poor girl obviously needs some kind of break...

 

[Armitage]

Either:

(a) Get them to pay for their place at you reception instead of a wedding gift
(b) Ask for cash as a wedding gift

Our biggest gripe was paying for people who said they were coming that didn't.