Things You Can't Say in the Throes of Passion

[jimharri]

Have you ever considered doing a few pelvic floor exercises?

I'm getting bored now, can i just flick you off?





And this is true.

'Can you move your baby its putting me off'

Met a girl in a club and we went back to her mates where her baby was being looked after - her mate was in bed and we starting messing about on the settee - she was worried her mates son might walk in so we went to the bedroom. We got undressed, I got on top and started where we'd left off. Then I heard a strange noise and looked to my right and there was a baby asleep propped between two pillows. That was it - I couldn't do it with a baby a foot away from my face!

She moved it onto a few pillows and used her coat as a blanket and normal servicing was resumed.

Had to be careful I didn't step on it as I sneaked out later and did a runner.

*Ring ring, ring ring*
''Hello; Mr Greeny, yes? Good afternoon Sir, I'm calling from Mills and Boon and we are big fans of your romantic storytelling and would like t offer you a position in our company....''

 

[inchy14]

If you're from Blackpool.....

....mum??

 

[Ding Dong]

Are you going down on me ?................. Or have you got a puncture ?