Toilet Attendants

[stony]

We have one on our job site.

A Turdis

 

[Blue Smarties]

Wow, you have these in mens bathrooms too?

You have African men chanting "no spray, no lay", "no splash, no gash" and "no Armani, no punani" in the women's toilets?

 

[idahoblues]

We have one on our job site.

Posh cunts

 

[Paul Lake's Left Knee]

You have African men chanting "no spray, no lay", "no splash, no gash" and "no Armani, no punani" in the women's toilets?

Only when she goes to 'upmarket' establishments, not in the usual shitholes she goes to.

 

[stony]

You have African men chanting "no spray, no lay", "no splash, no gash" and "no Armani, no punani" in the women's toilets?

Eat a curry, have a few beers and instead of going for a shit when you wake up, bake it all day. Go back to the club and drop a nice smelly turd at the start of his shift. Don't flush straight away, just sit there for a while and let it breathe.

 

[Paul Lake's Left Knee]

Eat a curry, have a few beers and instead of going for a shit when you wake up, bake it all day. Go back to the club and drop a nice smelly turd at the start of his shift. Don't flush straight away, just sit there for a while and let it breathe.

You eat curry??

 

[bluegirl74]

Only when she goes to 'upmarket' establishments, not in the usual shitholes she goes to.

Oi cheeky yam ****.
Not quite @Blue Smarties but women offering a spray of cheap perfume or a quick once over with the straighteners. All for a price of course but nothing makes you feel better about what you see in the mirror than 6 G&T :-(

 

[stony]

You eat curry??

No I fucking don't you cheeky bastard but young smartarse probably does. It smells bad enough on the way in, so I'm presuming it will be even worse on the way out.

 

[Blue Smarties]

Eat a curry, have a few beers and instead of going for a shit when you wake up, bake it all day. Go back to the club and drop a nice smelly turd at the start of his shift. Don't flush straight away, just sit there for a while and let it breathe.

Funny you mention that. I took a shit in a nightclub last night. A fucking nightclub. Have you seen the state of nightclub bogs? I had no choice.

I was going to make a thread on it but decided against it. There was no lock on the cubicle door, the bog roll was essentially tracing paper and to cap it all off there was no toilet seat. Down came the jeans, one hand on the door, one on the wall holding me up as I squat over a bog with puddles of piss around my feet. It exploded out. Red wine, vodka red bulls, the chillied fish I had for my dinner.

Fucking hell it was bad. Quick wipe and out into the middle of the dance floor before anyone could pin it on me.

Funnily enough, everyone chose to use the other cubicle for their evening activities after that.

 

[idahoblues]

Funny you mention that. I took a shit in a nightclub last night. A fucking nightclub. Have you seen the state of nightclub bogs? I had no choice.

I was going to make a thread on it but decided against it. There was no lock on the cubicle door, the bog roll was essentially tracing paper and to cap it all off there was no toilet seat. Down came the jeans, one hand on the door, one on the wall holding me up as I squat over a bog with puddles of piss around my feet. It exploded out. Red wine, vodka red bulls, the chillied fish I had for my dinner.

Fucking hell it was bad. Quick wipe and out into the middle of the dance floor before anyone could pin it on me.

Funnily enough, everyone chose to use the other cubicle for their evening activities after that.

Serious question...what the fuck is it with public toilets in England? They're always vandalised, not working, no doors, toilet paper. Why would the owners not want decent clean bathrooms....never understood it