United 2016/17

[flb]

This will be me when that happens..

I will need a bigger bag than that mate.

 

[jay_mcfc]

They should have gone hoof ball after ten minutes because they couldn't pass a ball for shite. Their fans can moan about the United Way all they want but that was the only way they'd have got anything from the game.

 

[Paul Lake's Left Knee]

The likes of Mata, Memphis, Smalling , Young and by all accounts Lingard and Martial kicking there heels on the bench doesn't bode well for them , the constant pressure to play Rashford, Rooney being utter dog shit week in week out- and Big nose ambling around not closing down and looking like a 34 year on one last pay day- not to mention the £89m pound man only resting his place because of his price tag.

Fucking delicious, and you know what-Maureen is only there because we got the man they really wanted.

Mourinho is so not a United manager-shit football with an attitude.

City are fucking calling the shots.

Rashford is the key, the more the rag hordes clamour for him, the more Maureen will be under pressure to play him (its the United way after all), then the more likely it will be he will drop one of Wiggy or the snez, then the fireworks will start.

 

[RightTurnClyde]

I'll try and save you all the hassle of having to visit the sad cafe with a quick summary.

Pre Match

"Zlatan and Jose vs the cnut Pep."

"Jose knows what he is doing."

"Still absolutely mental that they consider themselves to be same level as Utd and not "little" City anymore."

"Mkhitaryan and Lingard have obviously been chosen for their workrate just as much as their talent"

"3-0, Zlatan hattrick"

"Let's do this!"

"we should dominate the midfield with Pogba and Fellaini"

"Our squad is better I recon...."

"Ibra is going to embarrass Stones."

"Bailly will simply beast this lad. Quite simply, the kid will need his mum."

"Chuffed with that team. feck it - we'll smash them live."

Post Kick-off -

"City on top here"

"They're all over us..."

"City are bossing it right now with intense pressure. We have to get on the ball."

"City well on top, can't get close to them or there half"

"Awful start"

"City bossing this so far. Not finding Jose's tactics or selection inspiring."

"Mkhitaryan has been awful so far."

"Rubbish stuff. Our players have no time on the ball. We're panicking when pressed."

"we've been a bit unlucky, a bit clumsy, and a bit out worked."

1-0

"..."

"feck me"

"Get fecked"

"FFS how do you lose a flick on to midgets"

"Bollocks."

"We are a second rate side at the moment. Not even a competition."

"This could end bad"

"What a disaster."

"Last time City went 1-0 up at OT we went on to score 4."

"Funny that with all their fancy football it's a route 1 goal they score"

play continues -

"Jose is turning out to be a bit shit in big games these days."

"Pep is shitting on Jose ATM. They look miles better coached."

"Fernandinho is single-handedly destroying our midfield."

"If we're gonna get anything out of this Pogba is gonna be at the centre of it"

"Pep's a cnut!!"

"Our time of 6fters are being bullied by 4fters..."

"I miss Lvg"

"Did fellaini spit at him?"

"Fellaini has earned my respect."

"This is the longest half of football I've experienced in a long time. We're being outclassed."

2-0 -

"ffs"

"Painful to watch this."

"fecking joke."

"Surely he was offside"

"They're just way better."

"Devastating. I can't believe this."

"Ah, get fecked."

"What's going on?"

"All this tica taka crap, we score and they will fall to bits!"

"Wave the white flags"

"Jose's been schooled."

"Boooo"

"Hello darkness my old friend..."

"Filthy cnuts"

2-1

"fecking come on! Lets smash theae cnuts"

"That is a special finish."

"It's on!"

"It's Zlatan time"

Game continues

"Pogba's turn now"

"More long balls and crosses into the box please"

"Bravo will cost them the game."

"Rooney has been one of our best players."

"4-2 United"

"With the correct tweaks, we can win that game."

"I've not been that impressed by City I must admit"

"We can win this game"

"Need a Moyesque amount of crosses his half"

"Guardiola bringing off his striker for a DM...rattled"

"That's a penalty and a clear red"

"You mother fecker, Clattenburg."

"Studs up by keeper. Stonewall. Should be off."

"It's a fecking leg breaker"

"trust the bluemoon plebs to claim its a fair tackle. Dicks"

"Pogba just rugby tackling"

"feck off Clattenburg you fecking cnut. How can you not give a foul on Pogba there."

"Feck off"

"Where is pogba?"

"Why do City look so much fitter?"

"This officiating making me want to punch a wall"

"Mourinho parking the bus."

"Suddenlu I'm having a LVG Deja-Vu"

"We'll get a late equalizer, don't worry lads."

"Sir Alex looks disappointed. Keeps shaking his head."

"Moyes SOS."

"Gutted"

"I am not getting this City are everything comments."

"One of the most exciting United game I've seen."

"We are miles behind City in every aspect."

"City better than us. Clearly the Pep factor."

"A big important derby and City were victorious again."

"City had a lot of luck today."

"They played us off the park for 80% of that game."

"I'm done with football."

 

[flb]

Rashford is the key, the more the rag hordes clamour for him, the more Maureen will be under pressure to play him (its the United way after all), then the more likely it will be he will drop one of Wiggy or the snez, then the fireworks will start.

It's a fucking house of cards mate with blancmange as foundations.

 

[Abattoir Blue]

As the ref told your self appointed on-the-field ref at the time, he got the ball. So no foul, anywhere on the pitch.

Bravo was naturally concerned that Shrek may have hurt himself in a tough 50/50 challenge. It's what a lot of players do. Unless you're some thuggish win-at-all-costs type twat that is.

Yep. When we put the ball out for them they didn't give it back to us either. Correction, they did...but running back to our own touchline with a red tosser up one of our players' arse.

Graceless hackers and hoofers under Mourinho.

 

[Salford_Blue]

Nothing wrong there and even less when watching the slow motion. Won the ball, studs not over but on the ball. One footed. looks a good tackle if it was a defender.

His studs didn't touch the ball; it's the inside of his right foot. A perfect tackle that Vin would've been proud of.

Just because out Wayne play acts like he's broken his leg doesn't mean Bravo does anything wrong.

 

[yeseye]

This will be me when that happens..

What, you're going to eat Felonys head?

 

[East Level 2]

United fans seem to be bizarrely acting like at least they played well in the second half? Is that what passes for playing well over there these days? Because it was just aimless long ball stuff like you'd expect against a Pulis or Allardyce team, just hoping the ball randomly fell for someone.
Is it just complete denial they are all living in or have they really just accepted that they are a mid-table team now and think pumping it up for Fellaini constitutes a sign of good things to come?

They think hoofing it long to A&E and Shit Andy Carroll under Maureen is an improvement on hoofing it long to A&E on his own under the Chosen one and the turtle.

 

[bluethrunthru]

MOTD will have it down as GBH straight red go direct to Jail do not collect £200 though