United Thread | 2025/26

[noseve]

BBC is just a united fanzine. Article today with Rooney discussing whether his or garnachos was the best overhead kick ever.

Don't think a shin should even be in the mix, personally.

Ibrahimovic, Bale and my personal favourite Trevor Sinclair all knock the United pair into a cocked hat.

EDIT: Not the one for West Ham, the FA Cup goal for QPR. Show-off made a habit of it

 

[ChicagoBlue]

The body language from some of them yesterday was awful. When we were 1 nil up about 25 mins in and Fernandes fucked up to let the ball out of play for a throw in, he just shrugged and sulked. I know Fernandes is always prone to that but he usually leaves it until 70 mins on or so, not 1 nil down 25 or so into a derby

That was just his reaction to a poor pass to him that went out. Rather than have a go at his teammate, he gave the look and just looked bemused at the quality of the pass. The TV commentary even alluded to it.

 

[HelloCity]

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

That was just his reaction to a poor pass to him that went out. Rather than have a go at his teammate, he gave the look and just looked bemused at the quality of the pass. The TV commentary even alluded to it.

My favourite Ratface fuckup yesterday was straight after he’d tried to bully Foden in the first half after Phil had slid in with highish feet.

He then passed the ball straight out of play and he knew that he was going to get abuse from our players. His shoulders sank.

Funny.

 

[malg]

I love taking the piss out of this horrible club but what pisses me right off is the amount of in-depth inquiry every week when they get beat. Villa finished higher last season and having a bad start but nothing is said. The rags will not be relevant for 5 more years at least so we have this shite to put up with till then.

It's better than the alternative.

 

[Mad Eyed Screamer]

You must know your number is up when Rooney comes out with stuff like this

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

They don't have an edge anymore. That thing that they always had in the past. Robson, Hughes, Cantona, Keane, Rooney, Scholes all of them were dirty fuckers. And even if they lost a game, they booted the opposition about, got yellow and red cards. You were guaranteed to be in a fight.

Apart from their cropped Argentinian midget, they are to a man, a complete push over. They were bullied off the ball yesterday, and didn't put up any fight. 4 games into the season and they've already thrown in the towel.

If they don't bring in some sort of Gattuso clone lunatic, they will be lucky to get top half this season.

They could do worse than see what Tiatto is up to nowadays. Mind, would he want to turn out for a pile of shite!

 

[mexico1970]

Daywalking **** was born in Salford and he calls Ratface not a mancunian?

 

[ChicagoBlue]

The old players at United always talk about “The United Way,” as if they had some special right to play a certain way. It’s ridiculous! It was born of the ability to buy the best players in the world and integrate them into a system that worked, not only due to the quality of the players, but the psychological fear that came from playing them.

They don’t have EITHER anymore!

Today, they have some bang average young players and some older has beens trying to institute some new revolutionary plan for 3/5 at the back and 2 in the middle, that seemed to work OK in the Portuguese league!

This ain’t that!!

Amorim, given the players at his disposal, appears to be trying to talk himself into the sack, a big payoff, a 10 month break and a return home to safer shores!

 

[citytill1die84]

What a performance. The team were up for it from the off. Doku was absolutely brilliant. Defense much better, Khusanov is our new Zaba but faster. Foden & Dias much improved, O'Reily excellent especially his little nutmeg ha. We moved the ball much quicker, we pressed well and had more energy massive improvement. Oh and that Donnarumma save and knee slide to the rag fans ha

Let's hope it continues.

 

[Blue_Lightsaber]

I still don't understand why they got rid of De Gea AKA the Alpaca?

Wasn't he their player of the season for three years running?

He saved them a shit load of points (if you'll pardon the pun).

Not that I give a flying fuck, mind you.

I'm enjoying the pantomime. Long may it last.

Always rated him despite hating his team!

Now it seems like he kept them much higher in the table and their standings flattered them.

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

I think it’s great. Highlighting how shit they are and how it has to change every week, whilst it never does.

Yep, when they get pasted the meedya report is about how they can and should have avoided a pasting. There's only a couple of sentences about the team that's just given a mullering!

 

[discopop]

He has some very tough competition to be the worst signing! The money they have thrown on failures is never talked about anywhere. The list is endless. You can just name anyone from Di Maria, Falcao, Lukaku, Maguire, Van de Beek, Mount, Pogba, Antony, Onana, Hojlund, Zirkjee, Alexis Sanchez, Ugarte, Lisandro Martinez, Malacia, Sancho, Varane, Dan James, Elanga, Wan Bisaaka, Telles, Fred, Eric Bailley, Depay, Schniderlin. I may be missing others too.

Personally, Sancho (he actually got us more money when he was sold to them and was horrendous) & Lukaku are my most favourite United duds!

Can’t believe you’ve left the pig herder Schweinsteiger off that list he was one of the ones that was going to release Pogba

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Yep, when they get pasted the meedya report is about how they can and should have avoided a pasting. There's only a couple of sentences about the team that's just given a mullering!

Always funny to hear Keane having a fit because they haven’t kicked the shit out of the opposition in frustration.

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

Always funny to hear Keane having a fit because they haven’t kicked the shit out of the opposition in frustration.

United players are like cricket's Number tens. They don't mind batting but don't want the ball to hit them.

 

[The Fat el Hombre]

The fumbles at 14 and 28 seconds are worth a laugh

 

[Citi-leaks]

Always funny to hear Keane having a fit because they haven’t kicked the shit out of the opposition in frustration.

It's not about kicking the opposition as such, it's about not getting bullied. I see it in kids football on a Sunday morning. You have a bunch of Tarquins from Wilmslow, and they play a team from Wythenshawe and get twatted 12 nill. Not because they don't have the talent or skill, but because they don't have that fight in them. If you're easily shoved off the ball, then you are getting whooped.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

It's not about kicking the opposition as such, it's about not getting bullied. I see it in kids football on a Sunday morning. You have a bunch of Tarquins from Wilmslow, and they play a team from Wythenshawe and get twatted 12 nill. Not because they don't have the talent or skill, but because they don't have that fight in them. If you're easily shoved off the ball, then you are getting whooped.

Yeah, I get it, but it still amuses me how Keane delivers his impassioned rant.

 

[hertsblue]

Always funny to hear Keane having a fit because they haven’t kicked the shit out of the opposition in frustration.

Yep, he was moaning about them not having any bookings. The officiating for them in his era was bent, completely bent. So many reds they avoided time and time again. They still get away with a lot (dodgy calls in their Fulham and Burnley games) but even they can't commit common assault now with Var [depending onhow is on var)

 

[KentBlue]

Any other club, which had wasted billions of pounds and employed and dismissed so many different managers, in a repetitive and frequent manner over so many years, would have seen their support drop off a cliff.

And given some serious stick by an open and fair-minded media.

I've only seen a few brief highlights from yesterday, but from the little I have seen I don't think they've improved since Moyes became their 'Chosen One.'
By his own admission Moron is not a flexible man when it comes to tactics, and he will not change his style for anyone. But presumably the rags were aware of his stance when they went balls out to get him despite him telling them he'd rather wait. They would have known his views on how he likes his teams to set up, and yet they employed him aware of his 'straight jacket' approach anyway. And also gave him zillions to spend!

It seems to me the real problem at the swamp is not the manager, and it's not the players (who wouldn't want to go there for the amount of stupid money they are offering?), it's the bizarre recruitment policy they seem to have regarding both playing staff and the boardroom itself.

If the media in this country had a little more about them and had the guts to come out and say it how it is, maybe the rags hierarchy would sit in the boardroom and say,: 'Hey, maybe there is some truth in the rumours that we are not the greatest club in the universe? Maybe we really are as shit as most people tell us we are?'

And maybe they'd act accordingly? I hope not.