Love At First Sight?

mancityvstoke said:
Found this somewhere




6 weeks to 3 months
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Just stumbled upon this, early in the thread. That is one of the wisest, most insightful things I've ever read about Love. I've been happily married for 11 years and he's nailed it. Anyone can fall in love and it's probably the most beautiful thing that ever happens to a person. Whilst it feels like the most magical and spiritual thing in the world, it is actually your brain's way of tricking you into mating. But the bond that remains when the endorphins and serotonin have stabilised after a couple of years is what makes a lifelong partnership.

A word of caution/warning. It is not true that there is one person out there for everyone. You need to be careful because years down the line you can and will feel attraction for others in the "love at first sight" way some of you are describing.

It isn't "love at first sight". It's your brain recognising instinctively someone who ticks all the boxes and reacting like a firework going off.
 
IanBishopsHaircut said:
Is that not the very definition of love at first sight?
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Indeed. In my case, I was 26 and she was 29. We both knew the difference between lust and a deep lying connection that continues to this day. I would have had the same opinion as Dave and the video had it not happened to me.
 
IanBishopsHaircut said:
Is that not the very definition of love at first sight?
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Well it depends on your definition of love. It certainly feels like it, because Mother Nature is telling you "Potential Partner Alert" in the most spectacular way. Maybe not at the "sight" point, because that is just attraction and some people open their mouths and within five minutes you realise they aren't right for you. But in the very early stages as you get to know each other, and your brain is ticking off the compatibility boxes one by one, then you can feel yourself falling in love hard and spectacularly.

But often when you get through the fireworks and rainbow stage, for me, that's when you find out if it's true love: a deep bond and affection that can last a lifetime. That's why many relationships fail around the 2-3 year mark.

Whatever, it's the peak of human experience when you are going through that honeymoon phase. Enjoy it. If you chose correctly it is the most imprtant choice you will ever make.
 
Didsbury Dave said:
Well it depends on your definition of love. It certainly feels like it, because Mother Nature is telling you "Potential Partner Alert" in the most spectacular way. Maybe not at the "sight" point, because that is just attraction and some people open their mouths and within five minutes you realise they aren't right for you. But in the very early stages as you get to know each other, and your brain is ticking off the compatibility boxes one by one, then you can feel yourself falling in love hard and spectacularly.

But often when you get through the fireworks and rainbow stage, for me, that's when you find out if it's true love: a deep bond and affection that can last a lifetime. That's why many relationships fail around the 2-3 year mark.

Whatever, it's the peak of human experience when you are going through that honeymoon phase. Enjoy it. If you chose correctly it is the most imprtant choice you will ever make.
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Somewhat ironically, I would not claim that it was love at first sight with my wife but I do vividly remember the first time I saw her, in fact, I was with someone that day who I would say was a case of "love at first sight". I didn't get together with my wife until a few years later but that was over 30 years ago and we celebrated our silver anniversary last summer.
 
OB1 said:
Somewhat ironically, I would not claim that it was love at first sight with my wife but I do vividly remember the first time I saw her, in fact, I was with someone that day who I would say was a case of "love at first sight". I didn't get together with my wife until a few years later but that was over 30 years ago and we celebrated our silver anniversary last summer.
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I vividly remember meeting my wife. I interviewed her and ended up offering her the job. I was with a colleague and I remember clearly walking out and discussing how good she was and also how fit she was.

Like you, it was several years before we got together. In the meantime she had bought my business.

When we had only been together a few weeks we had our first weekend away in Llandudno. We walked down the pier and there was a man displaying owls. We were both transfixed with the owls and I remember at that point thinking 'this is the woman I want to spend my life with'. 2 years later I proposed to her on that exact spot, went down in one knee and said 'This was the place I fell in love with you and I've known since then you were the one for me. Will you marry me?".

We are still happy together 12 years later. So it wasn't 'love at first sight', but it happened quickly. The bonds you build at that stage can hold you together for life, but everything else has to be right, too.

When I was younger I went through that infatuation stage a number of times and the relationships collapsed down the line when reality kicked in and the endorphins wore off.
 
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