Joke thread

Bill Walker said:
A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender, who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his full beard.
“Are you the manager?”, she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. “Actually, no” the man replies.
“Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him,” she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.
“I’m afraid I can’t,” breathes the bartender. “Is there anything I can do?”
“Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message,” she continues, slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
"Ah..what should I tell him?” the bartender manages to squeak.
“Tell him,” she whispers, “there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies room.”
Click to expand...
Very funny Bill.
Best joke on this thread for the last few months!!
 
Three couples went to the Lake District for a weekend but didn't have reservations.

They were amazed to find only two rooms left in the whole area and each room had one bed.

They took the rooms & decided to have the three women share one bed & the three men share the other.

In the middle of the night, 1 man got up to leave. Another man asked him, "What are you doing?"

The first man answered, "I'm going to see my wife."

The second man asked, "What do you mean you're going to see your wife?"

The first man said, "I'm going to see my wife,I've got the biggest erection I've ever had."

The second man said, "Well, then, take me with you."

The first man said, "Why should I take you with me?"

The second man answered, "Because you're holding my dick."
 
Bill Walker said:
Three couples went to the Lake District for a weekend but didn't have reservations.

They were amazed to find only two rooms left in the whole area and each room had one bed.

They took the rooms & decided to have the three women share one bed & the three men share the other.

In the middle of the night, 1 man got up to leave. Another man asked him, "What are you doing?"

The first man answered, "I'm going to see my wife."

The second man asked, "What do you mean you're going to see your wife?"

The first man said, "I'm going to see my wife,I've got the biggest erection I've ever had."

The second man said, "Well, then, take me with you."

The first man said, "Why should I take you with me?"

The second man answered, "Because you're holding my dick."
Click to expand...
I just laughed out loud at this.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.