United Thread - 2022/23

[Gazza]

"....blowing hot and cold" - did I miss the hot bit? I did sneeze during one of their games to be fair.

 

[Protein Junkie]

Makes me laugh does this Comedy Club.
The self titled WGC and it’s skip rats who were so used to success.
If they do end up in the CL next season it will be the emperors new clothes dressed up as an outstanding success. Nitid are back.
Then come the summer signings, top after one game next season, shhh don’t say it, we are back.
Then failure, setting - spin wash, rinse and repeat.
Zebra pants and Norwich scarves.

 

[East Level 2]

Sancho thinks more about being a celebrity than wanting to be a footballer.

The rags have had a cluster of cunts that are all up there own arses. Sancho, Pogba, Antony, Martial, Lingard, Ronaldo, Greenwood, Morrison Lukaku, and many more.

The media praise them from the rooftops the moment they sign for the rags so it's no wonder they are up their own arses. There might be a tiny bit of media criticism after a poor result, but in general the players are wonderful, scuffed shots, fouls and dives are admired and any negatives are blamed on the Glazers.

 

[feedmpenzaandhewillscore]

Another day and yet again the media link United with 4 or 5 major signings…. I know brain cells are limited in the media but where exactly are United getting the cash from?

How they going to pay for new signings? Their mountain of debt seems to be going up and up, if you are looking to sell the club you don’t add more stuff owed out to the bottom line.

If you look at January they went for loan signings, and loan signings that were in the bargain basement bin. Their two best players bought in the summer were Casemiro who is 31 and a Real Madrid cast off and Erikson who not many clubs wanted to go near due to his unfortunate health issues. They are hardly building a team for the future and will cost a lot of money to replace in the future.

They are a long way off City yet, Champions league football if they get it next season will expose their shallow depth squad as they won’t be able to handle Premier league and champions league every few days. The circle of failure will continue.

 

[Gazza]

In their eyes

Tonight Matthew, we're going to be a Wham tribute act called WOM

(Waste Of Money)

 

[waspish]

How they going to pay for new signings? Their mountain of debt seems to be going up and up, if you are looking to sell the club you don’t add more stuff owed out to the bottom line.

If you look at January they went for loan signings, and loan signings that were in the bargain basement bin. Their two best players bought in the summer were Casemiro who is 31 and a Real Madrid cast off and Erikson who not many clubs wanted to go near due to his unfortunate health issues. They are hardly building a team for the future and will cost a lot of money to replace in the future.

They are a long way off City yet, Champions league football if they get it next season will expose their shallow depth squad as they won’t be able to handle Premier league and champions league every few days. The circle of failure will continue.

They’ll be desperately trying to sell players in the summer so they can get Kane and another player! Just hope clubs in premier don’t fall for it and buy there tripe..

 

[feedmpenzaandhewillscore]

They’ll be desperately trying to sell players in the summer so they can get Kane and another player! Just hope clubs in premier don’t fall for it and buy there tripe..

Who’s going to take some of their players though? Maguire, Sancho, Martial etc are on silly wages there’s probably a hand full of clubs in Europe that could take them but they won’t as they know how bad they are. It’s going to hamper them big time acquiring new personnel, I think we will witness a summer of lots of toys being chucked out of the pram from their supporters unless Scruffy Jim or Qatar manage to purchase them.

 

[the blue panther]

Have I missed the news - who bought them in the end?
What? Still for sale?
Must be scum then.
As you were blues.

 

[Xhavenjoe]

Tonight Matthew, we're going to be a Wham tribute act called WOM

They're going to be a West Ham tribute act?

 

[waspish]

Who’s going to take some of their players though? Maguire, Sancho, Martial etc are on silly wages there’s probably a hand full of clubs in Europe that could take them but they won’t as they know how bad they are. It’s going to hamper them big time acquiring new personnel, I think we will witness a summer of lots of toys being chucked out of the pram from their supporters unless Scruffy Jim or Qatar manage to purchase them.

Some desperate club will the likes of Maguire they’ll be happy to take 20m for him and martial the same and if those players want to play they drop there wage demands!

 

[Blueboy73]

I’m sure that I saw Ten Hag being lauded in the press for his brilliant management of someone with mental health issues, when Sancho scored the equaliser against Leeds.

“Brilliant return, for a compassionate patient manager” was the subtext.

Now, if he truly has got mental health issues, I sympathise with Sancho, but then this just shows Ten Hag as the opposite of wear they said. I wonder if it will be covered in the press?

I think we all know the answer to that.

 

[Blueboy73]

Another day and yet again the media link United with 4 or 5 major signings…. I know brain cells are limited in the media but where exactly are United getting the cash from?

If any of the clickbait is true they'll have to borrow to fund it.
It's OK though as everything they borrow is borrowed organically.

 

[Blueboy73]

Makes me laugh does this Comedy Club.
The self titled WGC and it’s skip rats who were so used to success.
If they do end up in the CL next season it will be the emperors new clothes dressed up as an outstanding success. Nitid are back.
Then come the summer signings, top after one game next season, shhh don’t say it, we are back.
Then failure, setting - spin wash, rinse and repeat.
Zebra pants and Norwich scarves.

They really are the gift that keeps on giving and long may it continue.
Their plastic fans get giddy and dig themselves into a hole time after time and it's hilarious.
St Beneathus Day is almost upon us once again.

 

[feedmpenzaandhewillscore]

Some desperate club will the likes of Maguire they’ll be happy to take 20m for him and martial the same and if those players want to play they drop there wage demands!

There’s better value elsewhere in other leagues for cheaper fees and wages, Akanji was an alright bit of business, there’s probably more promising younger defenders coming through the leagues that other teams in the premier league can acquire. Maguire’s confidence must be shot to pieces at United and I would imagine the rags would want bare minimum half of what they paid for him.

 

[dadnlad]

If any of the clickbait is true they'll have to borrow to fund it.
It's OK though as everything they borrow is borrowed organically.

got the old we only want glazers out because they havent spent on stadium and training ground gag other day, oh won something ha ha

change direction like wind

 

[The slaughtered lamb]

got the old we only want glazers out because they havent spent on stadium and training ground gag other day, oh won something ha ha

change direction like wind

Saw a banner the other day saying they want a sale but only a 100% sale. Loosely translated, we want the Qatar money but won’t come out and say it.

 

[dadnlad]

There’s better value elsewhere in other leagues for cheaper fees and wages, Akanji was an alright bit of business, there’s probably more promising younger defenders coming through the leagues that other teams in the premier league can acquire. Maguire’s confidence must be shot to pieces at United and I would imagine the rags would want bare minimum half of what they paid for him.

spursy will swap him for saint Arry
great deal by levy him and Dire in defence

 

[MichaelBBack]

Just for comparison's sake:

After 27 games played in 2020-21: 53 points, 55 goals scored, 32 conceded
After 27 games played last season: 47 points, 44 goals scored, 34 conceded
After 27 games played this season: 50 points, 41 goals scored, 37 conceded

They've not hugely improved in the slightest. They're the same. Smack bang in the middle of where they've been for the last few years in total mediocrity, with a Burnley striker up top to prove it. Their "tactical improvement" has led to fewer goals scored, more conceded, and the same points total.

In fact, when I rarely sit down to watch them, they look less dynamic and attacking than they did in the highs of Ole. They're dull, they packed their own box against Newcastle, they've cheated their way to a win against us and a couple of other very dodgy results, and yes, they might win the fucking Europa League, which they also did under Mourinho, but nobody really gives a flying fuck. They finished second under Mourinho, too, but did it help? Was it part of some big resurgence? Are United back, actually challenging for the league? Course not.

They're still shit, and they even set a record for shitness when one of the weakest Liverpool sides in recent times routed them. The only difference this season is that Liverpool, Chelsea, and Spurs have all decided to be a bit shitter and might therefore gift them a CL spot. But, even that is still very much to play for. It only takes one of Pool or Spurs to get their act together and we'll see what happens.

The media, for the millionth time, is trying to push this narrative that they're SO much better under ETH. They're not. You only have to watch them to see it. Sure, getting rid of the prima donna was a good move (that any manager with a modicum of sense would have made) and they've shown glimpses of being a bit better-organised from time to time, which is basically thanks to Casemiro, but they're not suddenly some world-beating side.

They've been insanely reliant on a suddenly in-form Rashford (and we all know how long his 'form' usually lasts) and Casemiro dragging them through games. And you see what happens when the former stops firing and the latter is suspended; they go back to the same old dreary, forgettable, mid-table football we've seen from them over the last decade.

Casemiro aside, their signings have been shit. Antony's as shit as his beard. Malacia is a walking foul machine. Weghorst feels like some sort of Beadle's About prank. And Martinez is just about alright but I don't think he'd walk into any top club defence. And as long as ETH keeps up his myopic insistence of bringing over average players from the Dutch league, they'll continue to make bad choices and have an average, laughable team masquerading as the Harlem Globetrotters of football.

And we'll continue dominating.

 

[Edward Deadwood]

Magpies are notorious for stealing food. Or is that seagulls?

I thought Magpies were renowned for flying off with shiny silver items. To be fair to Newcastle fans, they acknowledge that’s a Fairs Cop.

 

[flb]

Just for comparison's sake:

After 27 games played in 2020-21: 53 points, 55 goals scored, 32 conceded
After 27 games played last season: 47 points, 44 goals scored, 34 conceded
After 27 games played this season: 50 points, 41 goals scored, 37 conceded

They've not hugely improved in the slightest. They're the same. Smack bang in the middle of where they've been for the last few years in total mediocrity, with a Burnley striker up top to prove it. Their "tactical improvement" has led to fewer goals scored, more conceded, and the same points total.

In fact, when I rarely sit down to watch them, they look less dynamic and attacking than they did in the highs of Ole. They're dull, they packed their own box against Newcastle, they've cheated their way to a win against us and a couple of other very dodgy results, and yes, they might win the fucking Europa League, which they also did under Mourinho, but nobody really gives a flying fuck. They finished second under Mourinho, too, but did it help? Was it part of some big resurgence? Are United back, actually challenging for the league? Course not.

They're still shit, and they even set a record for shitness when one of the weakest Liverpool sides in recent times routed them. The only difference this season is that Liverpool, Chelsea, and Spurs have all decided to be a bit shitter and might therefore gift them a CL spot. But, even that is still very much to play for. It only takes one of Pool or Spurs to get their act together and we'll see what happens.

The media, for the millionth time, is trying to push this narrative that they're SO much better under ETH. They're not. You only have to watch them to see it. Sure, getting rid of the prima donna was a good move (that any manager with a modicum of sense would have made) and they've shown glimpses of being a bit better-organised from time to time, which is basically thanks to Casemiro, but they're not suddenly some world-beating side.

They've been insanely reliant on a suddenly in-form Rashford (and we all know how long his 'form' usually lasts) and Casemiro dragging them through games. And you see what happens when the former stops firing and the latter is suspended; they go back to the same old dreary, forgettable, mid-table football we've seen from them over the last decade.

Casemiro aside, their signings have been shit. Antony's as shit as his beard. Malacia is a walking foul machine. Weghorst feels like some sort of Beadle's About prank. And Martinez is just about alright but I don't think he'd walk into any top club defence. And as long as ETH keeps up his myopic insistence of bringing over average players from the Dutch league, they'll continue to make bad choices and have an average, laughable team masquerading as the Harlem Globetrotters of football.

And we'll continue dominating.

I rather like that post !