Most annoying football cliche?

[halfcenturyup]

I can't help it. Whenever I see a Brian Clough interview it reminds me of the Python Yangtze sketch.

 

[Big Swifty]

"An educated left foot".

Has it git a university degree?

 

[Postman Pep]

Transfer window is a cliche goldmine.

'Got to get your business done early' because you don't want to become 'desperate to get bodies through the door' just before 'the window slams shut '.

Also plenty of slapping price tags on players heads.

 

[theres only one carlito]

The gift that kept on giving this fella.

“If Plan A fails, they could always revert to Plan A.”

Mark Lawrenson.

 

[theres only one carlito]

“He can be as good as he wants to be; that's how good he can be.”

Mark Lawrenson

 

[Gazza]

"The ball gathered speed on the wet surface" - Balls are apparently impervious to the laws of physics.

"They're a non-league club" - That actually play in a league.

"Ha Ha, Scholes just can't tackle" - After he'd cut another opponent in half with a callous lunge.

"The goalkeeper wouldn't have got that had it been on target" - On target where, somewhere the goalkeeper couldn't reach?

"He's got that in his locker" - When a player has had a shot from 30yds and we've just seen that he obviously has that in his locker.

 

[petrusha]

"It evens itself out over the season", with reference to bad refereeing decisions.

It fucking doesn't, you know.

 

[West Yorks Owl]

"Gid rid of <insert manager name> now as he has no Plan B"

Said by football supporters up and down the land who's qualifications include watching the game after being in the pub since 11am on matchday, or having the ability to take Vauxhall Motors to PL & CL glory 8 years on the trot via Football Manager 2023.

How hard can it be? :)

 

[feedmpenzaandhewillscore]

‘Top bins’

Jimmy Bullard can fuck off

 

[Trevor Morley's Tache]

"The ball gathered speed on the wet surface" - Balls are apparently impervious to the laws of physics.

"They're a non-league club" - That actually play in a league.

"Ha Ha, Scholes just can't tackle" - After he'd cut another opponent in half with a callous lunge.

"The goalkeeper wouldn't have got that had it been on target" - On target where, somewhere the goalkeeper couldn't reach?

"He's got that in his locker" - When a player has had a shot from 30yds and we've just seen that he obviously has that in his locker.

Keegan on Sol Campbell: "That's his strength, his strength".

 

[kippax81]

"Lurking with intent".

Usually spouted by that fucking drivel laden boring **** Sam Matterface.

 

[Lovebitesandeveryfing]

Funniest thread on the entire forum. Keep it going, folks. This is a gold mine. The Lawrenson ones particularly are things to be treasured for the ages.
Has there ever been such a set of fuckwits from the same club elevated to the position of “pundit”?

 

[Pam]

Goals change games.

 

[Protein Junkie]

Six times Lah
Next season is ours lah
To be onist wiv yer
Worlds Greatest Club.
Money doesn’t guarantee success.

 

[Shaggy]

Joe Bugner advocating the use of Heroin at the end there, the dirty junkie bastard

 

[Kippax77]

De Gea is the best shot stopper in the world!

Getting an £80 million player for £40 million.

Absolute nonsense

 

[Shaggy]

"I done well there"
"He done well there"
"The boy done well there"
"We done well there"
"They done well there"
"The lads/boys done well there"

it's fucking "did" you dopey shit gibbons

"At the end of the day" what ? it gets dark ?

"Those knowledgeable Liverpool fans" oh just fuck off

 

[City Hobgoblin]

"The ball must of went..."

 

[kaz7]

Mine is when blues say how the fuck did we lose to X , very annoying

He has to score that , usually said by a no mark commentator telling world class players what they should have done

 

[Postman Pep]