United Thread | 2025/26

  • Thread starter Thread starter Ric
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Berti No Show said:
Spot on to be honest. Honestly, watching players and managers go to United is like watching talented actors sign up for a film directed by Michael Bay, they arrive with potential, but by the end it’s all explosions, no plot, and you’re wondering how on earth they forgot how to kick a ball, let alone act.

United isn’t a football club anymore, it’s an overpriced theme park. The ride names say it all: "The Theatre of Dreams".

The media still try to flog us the same tired fairy tale: “This time it’s different.” Yeah, and I’m winning Love Island next summer. The only thing different about United is the sponsor on their sleeve!

Their fans genuinely believe they’re “too big to fail,” but really, they’re just too profitable to change. Like you said - it’s the corporate equivalent of Big Tobacco. Only instead of selling addiction in a box, they’re selling trauma in a shirt. And their supporters will keep buying the replica kits, mugs, lampshades, and probably branded toilet roll to wipe away the tears after another Europa League night in Kazakhstan.

The best bit? When these players escape Old Trafford, it’s like watching someone leave a toxic relationship. Suddenly they’re smiling again, playing freely, rediscovering themselves as players. Just got to look at Rashford's recent interview.

United fans will keep queuing up though. It’s like they’re paying £90 a shirt to cosplay as title contenders. Meanwhile, the Glazers are sat in Florida, lighting cigars with season ticket renewals.

Victims of their own success? Absolutely. It’s like they peaked in the 90s and early 00's, forgot the world moved on, and now they’re basically the Nokia 3310 of Football Clubs. Durable brand, still nostalgic to some, but ultimately useless in the modern game.

But, at some point I do expect them to come back. Maybe not this decade, but they're spending billions and billions. Let's just hope they combust as a football club with overloaded debt.
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Trying to buy success they are......
 
A rag at work was telling me today we are cheats
Hates us more than the dippers.
We are the absolute scum.

When I asked why what have we done .
He just said well.
You must have done something bad cos it's 115 times.
Fuck off nob head
 
Fuck me just seen SKY News platform Goldbridge without a mention that his real name is Brent Di Cesare
 
bluethrunthru said:
Fuck me just seen SKY News platform Goldbridge without a mention that his real name is Brent Di Cesare
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He used a name that wasn't his own so that he wouldn't get doxxed online, now he has a brand that uses that name and he'd be stupid to change it.

This fuckwit has done more harm to the rags than good, I hope he carries on for a long time to come.
 
mexico1970 said:
This interview on SKY with Amorin believe it or not is the first time I have heard him talk, he's speaking but saying the sum total of fuck all.

Which is smashing :)
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He reminds me of James Hacker MP from Yes, Minister - he just talks. And as sir Humphrey said to Hacker “just because some one asks you a question, it doesn’t mean you have to answer it” - Amorim should take that advice
 
Whilst killing time, I decided to see what Google’s AI would make of the PR guff statement that United have had at least one youth academy graduate in their matchday squad since 1937.

It came back 1st off with saying there were many many sources saying this (who knew), and that it’s a ‘proud tradition’.

I then asked it about checking on John O’Shea and cross checking any matchday squads for any academy graduates in the matches he played in… it came back with the PR guff again.

I then stated check the match on 01/05/11 against Arsenal, to which it came back with ‘Wes brown’ played that game according to XYZ website from 2020.

I then sent it a link to the bbc report for the actual match, not the (wrong , same season) one it was thinking of
IMG_4135.jpeg

It was almost shocked that this existed and disproved the PR guff. It tried to wheedle out of it by saying ‘it’s generally assumed John O’Shea was an academy player.

The coup de grace came with this Wikipedia entry, showing he moved to United by signing professional forms.
IMG_4134.jpeg

It’s no wonder, this and other fictional PR guff about United survives…
It took awhile for AI to work out, so lemmings have no chance.
 
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