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I put the start of the rags game on and they went 2-0 up, so I went to the gym. Just got in and it's 3-2 Porto now. They are comedy gold at the moment.

Good result for Villa.

It's a bit boring this. Teams totally mismatched. The standard of the CL has gone down with the extra teams in it.

Nice finish from Phil!

Mr Whippy!

Could be a high scoring game tonight.

It's only a bit of piss. Not sure what the fuss is about! If someone from the gutter press follows someone around with a camera for long enough they will find something to "report" on. Not sure why people buy that shit.

The onion puns are making me cry with laughter!

It's a special shirt for Oktoberfest apparently.

We were OK in patches but not really fully firing. I would have liked to see Foden & Savinho come on earlier than they did. If Gundo had squared the ball to Erling instead of trying the chip, then we probably would have gone on to win the game, but shit happens. Great finish from Josko for the...

He’s a ****.

It's a shame that neither Doku or Savinho are starting, but they can always come off the bench if needed. Not too sure who's going to be creating the chances for Erling, but hopefully it will all work out.

This is one occassion when pics are not needed!

He needs dropping on current form but will probably start every game now. I'd much rather see Rico start than him.

We have played without Rodri all season, apart from the first part of the last game. How's this game different than the first 4? On their day, especially at home, Newcastle can give anyone a game, but we are better than them all over the pitch, so if we turn up we have a good chance of beating...

Inter defended very well and we were a bit off the pace. Gundo had a few good chances to snatch it though. A draw was probably a fair result but it wasn't the best to watch.

Spurs are shite.

This is where I've been going wrong. I always thought the last part was when you are in Tesco. That might explain why I'm banned from entering any branch and am on the sex offenders register!

Pickford is dogshit. No idea how he gets in the England team.

Is that a Bobby Davro look a like?