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Joseph Barton ‏@Joey7Barton Jan 7 What was the point of him retiring. He's at every game. Go on holiday. Play golf. Spend time with your family. Or friends Busy c*nt #fergie

I believe it was that philosopher, pacifist and great thinker of our time that so eloquently described that drunken, pooey pants, knight of the realm's current status. 'Busy ****' - Sir Joseph of Barton, Via Twatter

A cig and a brew.

Re: Caption competiton - Anderson Does anyone else think that Anderson and his tatoo artist urgently need to be shown a map of the Earth?

I'm on Book 4 of the Wheel of Time series. My friend recommended it to me as 'the most rewarding series he's ever read'. It's good, but fuck me it takes a lifetime for anything to happen. I read 'The Lies of Lock Lamora' by Scott Lynch and it's absolutely brilliant if you like the humor and...

Overrated down here mate, can't get fibre optic broadband, can't get Sky, Tea shops over priced, no decent restaraunts, everyone's arse hole is twitching like a rabbit's nose because we've had a bit of rain and everywhere's flooded. There is literally no crime though, I've left the key in the...

Re: Hunt for missing 3 year old in Edinburgh Not really though is it? I imagine she would know which of his clothes were missing.

I think as a nation we're very self depricating and we don't respond well to compliments. I remember an episode of Screenwipe when Reginald D Hunter was talking about 'Rumpole of the Bailey' and how he was totally confused about how Rumpole's wife was horrified when a dinner guest was...

If you look at bonfire night for example, alot of people just celebrate that at the weekend regardless of what day it falls on. Some of my Irish mates used to do that with Paddy's day as well.

We have St. George's day and the truth is nobody is that arsed I think it's cause we're quite an understated nation or too lazy, I haven't decided. What is annoying is the people that like to complain that they aren't allowed to celebrate St. George's day because it would offend 'Johnny...

I'm sorry, but what a fucking shit house.

Funny as fuck. Proper going at each other then suddenly found common ground when they both agreed Fellaini's shit.

Anyone just hear that rag on 5live say that they need to get Moyes out and get Cantona or Steve Bruce in? Ahahahahaha

Aldi is great. My girlfriend is from Yorkshire so naturally she was the one to suggest that we start shopping there and it blew my mind. Last week we got a week and a halves worth of stuff (Four 'bag for lifes' full) for forty quid. Their garlic bread baguettes, yoghurts, and fajita kits...

Martin Keown walked past me last week whilst I was stood at pizza van in Gloucester Green Market in Oxford. It's a moment that will stay with me for a very long time because the pizza was delicious and at £3.99 plus a pepsi, down here that's a fucking bargain.

:D It gave me a juvenile giggle so I thank you for that.

To be fair we're only just nearly half way through the season and with a change of manager they could still drag themselves into the top four, especially if they buy a strike partner for Soldado in Jan. You should be careful brandishing round terms like 'flop of this season'. Didn't Fat Sam...

This. The back of a young ladies head is the equivalent to say some of us looking at another spreadsheet.

Oh no! Like reverse Soylent Green.