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Duck lips. Looks absolutely disgusting, to me at least. Imagine having a great body, perfect hair, yet in your quest for beauty you ask a surgeon to make your lips look like an anal prolapse. Why people park on pavements, forcing pedestrians to go onto the road to get past, even when the road...

Yes, needed them after a couple of years working in an office staring at a pc all day, that was in my late 20s. Am sure it was the job that accelerated it all, now I have to listen to safety in the workplace and display equipment safety briefings every month...bit late for some of us!

Felt bad since after the 4Fans event at love factory. Sore throat, cough, but no temperature. Put it down to excessive celebrating, then hayfever, but was worse by yesterday so took COVID test. Negative. Caught COVID for the first time just 2 months ago, but according to most sources you can...

Fantastic movie. Took my then girlfriend to see it as revenge for having to sit through titanic twice.

Had congratulations from one Leeds, one Everton, one Arsenal so far. Nothing from the 7 or so rags and 3 dippers. But I suppose it is Monday morning and they truly are really, really busy and just can't be their usual gobby selves. Lovely!

What are we?

All together now... One of these clubs is not like the others! Price of success sure. What's United's spending then eh, Sam? Price of keeping up with the noisy neighbours, failing and becoming a laughing stock?

I'm starting to waver now. Had work to keep me occupied all week, now it's Friday, I'm sick of the moaning gits at work and I'm thinking about tomorrow non stop. No idea how I'm going to cope tomorrow. If ever there was a need for a watford-like cup final game, it's tomorrow. No chance with...

How long before commentators and pundits alike officially rename him 'Macca' or 'Lexy Mac'?

There is something odd going on with this guy, but not so sure it's what he says it is. They seem to be releasing snippets of the interview daily, I guess to draw it out and increase interest. What we do know is that he did hold a position within the DoD. We also know he is commenting of things...

Was listening earlier to something I'd not heard before... We sent over paratroopers to set up dummies, with recordings of gunfire, to take German troops away from the real landing sites. It worked, delaying German reinforcements, although most of the brave paratroopers who set these posts up...

Cheers. I'm clipping the final few seconds of that and it will be my standard response to all fans from now on when they mention cheating, oil money, size of our squad or ffp.

Quick question on sponsorship in junior football, hope it's ok to add in here. I thought betting firms weren't allowed to advertise at all in and around the young ages? Club near my dad's has just had a big betfred logo stuck on the gass at the side of the pitch, public land too apparently...

Fuzzy head, and a pain in my left side which won't go away. No idea how that happened. Other than that, buzzing! Off out for some air in a minute, something tells me I won't see a single scum shirt.

Dortmund fan I know said he's ok but prone to an error, likes to play out from the back but isn't solid. Apparently they needed him off the books hence the push to do a deal, I think because he wouldn't sign a new contract or wanted a wage increase. I wasn't overly excited when he arrived, but...

Penalty very hard to take, especially after the dodgy offside they got against us earlier in the season. How many times do we come off the pitch against united talking about how they benefitted from a dodgy decision? Every game. The foul on Kev, we were awarded a near identical penalty a few...

Absolutely nothing at all to see here. Said Howard Webb after collecting his Maserati and seasonal 'thank you' Seiko watch from sir bacon chops. All off the books of course. I mean, who exactly gets to vet premier league chief executives prior to their appointment? Manchester United and...