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Crikey, drum karaoke

I danced to that song the other day, and now I need to see a Cairo-practor

Blimey, flashbacks to Billy Bunter, the fat accomplice…

Crikey, inflation is a bugger, I got a Bosch 3 years ago from eon and added a 10 year warranty for £2,200 - wasn’t the cheapest they did as I went mid range too, mainly because it had the offer of 4 years interest free credit too (BG look like they’ll do 3 years now) Edit, should have looked at...

My friend couldn't pay his water bill, so I sent him a “get well soon” card…

Brilliant, when you get tonight’s result let us know and I can slap a cheeky bet on before it starts here ;)

Now you mention it, that’s my underlying reasoning

A wise man said “we are all pupils and teachers”, but he was a bit of a twat… Personally I work in IT and parent half a dozen kids (who do go to school - apart from the grown up ones)

Just been trawling the threads, realised it’s gone 1am on a school night - asked myself why am I still checking Bluemoon? For me, it’s because I just overpaid at auction for an old bench from Bristol Zoo, so winding down - you?

My vegan girlfriend said people that sell meat were gross, so I told her people that sell vegetables were grocer…

Wouldn’t it be great if it turned out that the gods were just visitors from other planets, trying to point humans in the right direction? Maybe one or two got carried away and created the shit show of current times, but I can imagine Hern the Hunter teaching “look, if you kill all the deer...

Sounds a little bit like “disguised owner investment = evil” “in full view owner investment = good” both are owner investment - worse we never disguised owner investment!

How do farmers party? They turnip the beets Merry Christmas one and all! Ah, sorry that last bit was from the cracker…

Cheers - that was in 2020 for which my wife and I got invited to Buckingham palace for a garden party (was delayed by Covid till 2022 but kept thinking marillion) it’s a bit more now we do temporary emergency placements. All our guests bring pleasure - some by arriving, some by leaving :)

Oh, if that doesn’t work, smash her back doors in (fnarr) and brick the windows…

I’ve been a foster parent for 20 years and hear similar stories regularly. Social services are mainly arse covering these days after several high profile failures starting with the death of “baby P”, but they do try and help even if it doesn’t feel like it mostly. First port of call contact...

Mad as it sounds there were clocks for it - corn exchange in Bristol has a GMT and local time clock still https://www.atlasobscura.com/places/corn-exchange-dualtime-clock Also, it’s my birthday Sunday so I get an extra hour for it ;)

Awww, he knows something… Oh, actually we should all know by now, they have nothing!

Shit, I read that as Steve Harley and thought “not Mr. Soft!”, realised it’s the twat Harvey, so felt glad, then found out he died in March this year! Rollercoaster…

How dare you call a guy who copies and pastes jokes for our enjoyment a plagiarist! Oh, wait…