Irony apart, are you really expecting the EU to give us the same good deal we have now without our being a member? So any deal we get is going to be worse than what we have now, so it's only a question of "how bad".I can't see us getting a shit deal for two reasons. Firstly the EU is a benign organisation and not intent on malicious action such as this. Secondly, EU membership is surely so wonderful that even if we get a good deal other nations will still not want to leave? The way you frame it makes it sound almost as if the EU is some sort of federalist dictator that would try through the threat of a bad deal to coerce countries into remaining.