Came out...

[roaminblue]

hahahaha, love it. Friend has a crisis and first thought:

"geddit on bluemoon!"

not a slight on you, and of course I jest.

However, to answer your question, she'll know better than anyone how strong their relationship.

Is he "gay" or "bi"? I mean, if he's gay, I'm not sure that is particularly promising for their relationship, effectively they will just become friends surely?

If the latter, I'd suggest that is easier to justify staying with each other.

I think she needs to try and understand what he wanted to gain from telling her this. To me, it would probably be due to him being unhappy with something; which again, doesn't seem particularly positive for their marriage.

 

[squirtyflower]

My mate's (and I do mean my mate, not me!) husband 'came out' to her yesterday.
He claims he's always been attracted to men, but has never acted on it. But he'd like to discuss the possibility of an 'Open Marriage' sometime in the future
He wants to stay married to her and loves her deeply and their sex life is better than it has been for ages.

She's obviously devastated, but still loves him, they have been a couple for years and have two children. She has no desire to be with anyone else.

What should she do? Stay and trust that he won't experiment/ cheat on her?
Or leave?

And you made the wise choice of bringing this to the attention of the grand old dames of Bluemoon?

Good grief

 

[TCIB]

How is the sex life better, does she put a fake tash on or something or has a large strapon been aquired ?

 

[JoeMercer'sWay]

Threesomes?

this, she has an opportunity here.

 

[TheMightyQuinn]

'Hey baby, yeah so I'm gay, always have been, sorry I married you and fathered your children by accident, not sure what I was thinking, any chance you'd stick around whilst I get the poppers out?'

Having his cake and eating it.

 

[mackenzie]

I think his suggestion is completely selfish.
He wants the home 'comforts' and yet also wants her to put up with a very different marriage than the one she entered into.

 

[salfordpaul]

its doomed.........is she attractive and independant or the needy type?

 

[jma]

People like to laugh and joke when they hear about situations like this, treating as if the people involved aren't real people and are some sort of comedy stereotype. But you have to remember that this sort of situation is more common than you think and many people feel society and social convention pressurises them into relationships that don't express the real them. It can be crushing to live a lie and it is a trial for any couple to be faced in with such a revelation. It can only be overcome with a great deal of soul searching and compromise, if they have it in them.

Factor in things like trial separations and the thorny issue of custody becomes involved. Which has to be the crux of the matter. At the end of the day, regardless of their changing feelings for each other, attitudes towards custody becomes the major issue and a matter of well being for all involved. Eventually they will just have to bite the bullet and face up to it and address that question; just who is going to get custody of the dildos?

 

[Ammy]

My mate's (and I do mean my mate, not me!) husband 'came out' to her yesterday.
He claims he's always been attracted to men, but has never acted on it. But he'd like to discuss the possibility of an 'Open Marriage' sometime in the future
He wants to stay married to her and loves her deeply and their sex life is better than it has been for ages.

She's obviously devastated, but still loves him, they have been a couple for years and have two children. She has no desire to be with anyone else.

What should she do? Stay and trust that he won't experiment/ cheat on her?
Or leave?

And you made the wise choice of bringing this to the attention of the grand old dames of Bluemoon?

Good grief

I was looking for a male point of view.
We are all offering our opinions, but we are all female.
I don't think she'll base her decision purely on what BM comes up with, I just thought it might be a helpful input for her..

 

[TCIB]