Do you swear a lot?

The funniest one I can recall is when I went with my mate and his mum and dad for a day at the seaside when I was about 11 or 12 . We went to this cafe and it was empty apart from us and this old couple at the next table. It had a Space Invaders and my mates dad gave us 10p each to have a go. I went first and managed a level or two but when it came to my mates turn he lost his first life pretty fast, so he told me to go and sit down as I was distracting him. Not long after he obviously lost his final life without reaching my score and shouted out really loud, "Bastard!!". Not wanting to cause a scene or offend the old couple , my mates dad waited until he got back to the table and calmly but in a loud enough voice so the old couple could hear said "Ah Blasted, you got Blasted did you son". To which my relieved mate said "Yeah". The old couple had clearly heard what he'd said and the old man in particular was trying not to laugh.
A few minutes later the old couple had finished their drinks and were leaving. As they were passing our table they both said goodbye to be polite. We all replied back with the same. The old man turned and nudges my mates arm and said to him "Never mind lad, those aliens can be right bastards can't they!!". The old couple calmly walked out as my mate, his dad and I burst out laughing. His mum who didn't like swearing was less than amused, nudged his dad's arm and said the typical "We all know who he's picked that up from don't we"
 
PW said:
When I was seventeen I got an apprenticeship on the maintainence side for a large insurance company. The bloke I worked with could not speak a sentence without swearing and was constantly complained about because of his language.

One particular day in January the main component of the heating system for the entire building went down five minutes before he was due to finish. Head office rang him to ask what was wrong with his response being and I quote "Fuck me, the fucking fuckers fucking fucked" He was a legend
Click to expand...

If anyone can replace that sentence with one that conveys both the seriousness of the situation and at the same time expose the emotional turmoil caused by it, I would love to read it.

The man is a fucking Savant.

There is no such thing as 'bad language' if it communicates the situation then it has done its job.
 
i run a kids football team, and the guy that helps me out, says he has never uttered a swear word in his. He's not a church goer or anything like that. Just says you lose an argument once you have to start swearing, therefore never uses any bad language ever. I told him he's a c*nt
 
Ancient Citizen said:
'Cunthooks' carries more weight imo. This video explains why a certain swear word is magnificent...

Click to expand...


Love it.

That should be used to help kids learn what nouns, adjectives, etc are. If you use the word fuck in those different contexts, it helps to make them understood. :)
 
Only been asked to tone it down once by a steward inside the ground, and this was because of the use of my favourite expletive '****'. To be fair, i was hurling it with extra vigour at the fat, ugly, bald, potato resembling **** known as Rooney.

Can't help swearing, i'd bet i'd give @gordondaviesmoustache a run for his money, though i do try and watch what i say in front of my mum.

This is a classic though.............

 
I remember when I was about 11, my dad was driving us down Deansgate when some arse tried to cut us up. Dad shouted "you fucking ****". Never been so shocked in my life .
Never heard him say anything stronger than bloody before or since. The old ****'s dead now.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.