Homeless people/addiction.

I have fostered children and young people for over 20 years. A lot of the young people i have cared for are often very damaged due to their childhood circumstances. Sadly, it's not uncommon for care leavers to end up homeless. Many children in care have had to grow up very quickly but are emotionally not equipped for the big wide world. I myself have been homeless many years ago when I was 16. There are hundreds of complex issues that can lead to homelessness and I definitely can understand why anybody in that situation would drink or take drugs. Personally I look back and wonder how the hell I didn't.
 
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metalblue said:
Choosing alcohol as an escape route was not the right choice for him, but once it became an addiction he lost choice of behaviour/ action. Furthermore it was only once it was an addiction his problems really set in, lost his job etc.

Nobody knows they’ve slipped into addiction until it’s too late. If you’ve ever lived with an alcoholic or other addict you’ll know that.
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Exactly. Made a bad choice. From there, he lost control of the ACTUAL problem.
 
metalblue said:
Choosing alcohol as an escape route was not the right choice for him, but once it became an addiction he lost choice of behaviour/ action. Furthermore it was only once it was an addiction his problems really set in, lost his job etc.

Nobody knows they’ve slipped into addiction until it’s too late. If you’ve ever lived with an alcoholic or other addict you’ll know that.
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...and many people can't make the right choices when they're under so much stress or an emotional wreck.
I hate that attitude :" I'm ok...I didn't make the wrong choices...so other people should be ok".
 
kippax123 said:
I have fostered chindren and young people for over 20 years. A lot of the young people i have cared for are often very damaged due to their childhood circumstances. Sadly, it's not uncommon for care leavers to end up homeless. Many children in care have had to grow uo very quickly but are emotionally not equipped for the big wide world. I myself have been homeless many years ago when I was 16. There are hundreds of complex issues that can lead to homelessness and I definitely can understand why anybody in that situation would drink or take drugs. Personally I look back and wonder how the hell I didn't.
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Well done!

Also grew up with foster children and around alcohol addiction. Life can be a razor’s edge and our personal choices can be highly consequential, to the point of life altering.
 
Scottyboi said:
Bit different if you have no kids and aren't used to being married, rather than an ageing bachelor isn't it.
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I have no kids and haven’t been married. I’m also not that old mate haha - I’m 40.
 
give it to gordon said:
but for the grace of god.

I work for a local council and thanet has it's fair share of homelessness and drinkers. Most of them are polite to us and give us no problems. But these people shouldnt be pre judged.

We also work alongside and help the sally army who do amazing work.

Now if you had asked me 10 years ago I would have had totally different views. Sally army bible bashing nutters and bloody wine's.

Lots of these people have no support network, if your marriage breaks up you get no support etc. Its so easy to end up broken. They may come from trouble childhoods. Some may have mental health problems again little support.

If I didnt have a close family to support me after my marriage break I could have had serious problems. I was working 40 hrs but had no money, it was going to the ex to support our kids. I had nothing and no help from the government. I ended up with around 10k debt, my dad bought me a cheap mobile home to live in, but I couldn't afford to heat it, light it or even eat some times.
I was so lucky to have support and a strong mind set. But it took its toll, even with help, I am now on antidepressants but happily married.

But it could so easily have been me on the park bench.

Dont pre judged these people.

Not everyone is strong enough to ignore booze and drugs thankfully I was but there were times when I was thinking about ending it all. Thankfully I didn't
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Glad to hear you’re doing well now pal.

Just to follow on from your post I think people also don’t realise that a lot of people won’t ask for help. They are to ashamed and feel like a failure and don’t want to burden others with their ‘self-pity’ as others put it. It’s a matter of pride and rightly or wrongly that’s how they feel.

Their drinking and drugs is their ‘getting on with it’ it’s their coping mechanism and unfortunately it has consequences that they just do not see.

Losing your wife and especially your kids full time and becoming the weekend dad with a shit house you never wanted to be in and alone is a horrible turn of events. Then to witness your ex moving another fella in is fukin torture! Especially if you have had no control over the events.

You’re grieving your old life, the one you dreamt of and enjoyed more than anything in the world with the people you love the most. Then it’s torn away.

Grief is a very very powerful emotion and anyone who says ‘just get on with it’ is talking bollocks. It doesn’t always work that way. It ain’t that simple.
 
metalblue said:
Choosing alcohol as an escape route was not the right choice for him, but once it became an addiction he lost choice of behaviour/ action. Furthermore it was only once it was an addiction his problems really set in, lost his job etc.

Nobody knows they’ve slipped into addiction until it’s too late. If you’ve ever lived with an alcoholic or other addict you’ll know that.
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That last part is very true mate, and exactly the same for depression too, it’s insidious, and often it’s others who will point something out to you, which is often met by that persons defence mechanism because they don’t believe them, or don’t want to believe them.
theres only one carlito said:
You’re grieving your old life, the one you dreamt of and enjoyed more than anything in the world with the people you love the most. Then it’s torn away.

Grief is a very very powerful emotion and anyone who says ‘just get on with it’ is talking bollocks. It doesn’t always work that way. It ain’t that simple.
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It is bud, the loss of a close, loving relationship is exactly the same grief process and emotional experience as a loved one passing away.
 
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