how was your day?

Full of emotion at the minute, hating my time at work even though I'm earning a wage that I never thought I'd ever achieve. Only £45k which isn't much in UK anymore but it's stuff me and my Mrs could only have dreamt of a few years ago.

I train in the gym religiously most days which keeps the demons at bay, but increasingly feeling like I'm in the wrong room at work. Have no real working relationships with any of the team. First thought of the day the last few days has been to go lie in the bath when my Mrs goes out to work and cut my wrists and femoral artery, leave a note on door to say don't come in and call the police. Then the logical side of my brain says don't ever do that to that girl, or whilst your parents are still alive.

I've had chronic depression I'd say for as long as I can remember. Likely following a family trauma as a child that I blamed on myself for many years. I've had the therapy and am teetotal but not had a wave like this in a good 2 or 3 years. Confidence through the floor and certain colleagues irritating the life out of me whenever I see or hear them in the office.

I know I'll come through this but very close to walking away from yet another job, early 30s and still don't know what I want to do with my life career wise.
 
I went to the pain clinic yesterday for help as my pain is ten fold this last four months or so , found it helpful and they gave me some stretching excersises to do and going back next week for some coping skills and meds review and to see if what we discussed yesterday helps , long trek for me and very painful day as sitting up causes me a ton of pain in my hips . Really hoping they can help me as this is becoming unbearable to live with , feel really down today
 
Full of emotion at the minute, hating my time at work even though I'm earning a wage that I never thought I'd ever achieve. Only £45k which isn't much in UK anymore but it's stuff me and my Mrs could only have dreamt of a few years ago.

I train in the gym religiously most days which keeps the demons at bay, but increasingly feeling like I'm in the wrong room at work. Have no real working relationships with any of the team. First thought of the day the last few days has been to go lie in the bath when my Mrs goes out to work and cut my wrists and femoral artery, leave a note on door to say don't come in and call the police. Then the logical side of my brain says don't ever do that to that girl, or whilst your parents are still alive.

I've had chronic depression I'd say for as long as I can remember. Likely following a family trauma as a child that I blamed on myself for many years. I've had the therapy and am teetotal but not had a wave like this in a good 2 or 3 years. Confidence through the floor and certain colleagues irritating the life out of me whenever I see or hear them in the office.

I know I'll come through this but very close to walking away from yet another job, early 30s and still don't know what I want to do with my life career wise.
Hope you get through this Blue.
 
Going through a tough time myself just now, last May I said on here my sons girlfriend was diagnosed with a cancerous brain tumour and had only 12 months to live she is still having treatment at Christie’s, yesterday we found out my 21 year old Step granddaughter as got several tumours on her brain, she had a baby 6 months ago.we are raking things one day at a time.
 
I went to the pain clinic yesterday for help as my pain is ten fold this last four months or so , found it helpful and they gave me some stretching excersises to do and going back next week for some coping skills and meds review and to see if what we discussed yesterday helps , long trek for me and very painful day as sitting up causes me a ton of pain in my hips . Really hoping they can help me as this is becoming unbearable to live with , feel really down today
Bless you, as you know if you did some stretching exercises yesterday, the pain you’re feeling today is a result of that. Long term they should help. Let’s hope your medication review will also help.
 
I went to the pain clinic yesterday for help as my pain is ten fold this last four months or so , found it helpful and they gave me some stretching excersises to do and going back next week for some coping skills and meds review and to see if what we discussed yesterday helps , long trek for me and very painful day as sitting up causes me a ton of pain in my hips . Really hoping they can help me as this is becoming unbearable to live with , feel really down today
Keep your spirits up hun. Can you not get out and go for walks like you used to? X
 
Bless you, as you know if you did some stretching exercises yesterday, the pain you’re feeling today is a result of that. Long term they should help. Let’s hope your medication review will also help.
The pain i have today is mostly from sitting upright for the hours trip to the clinic and back and being there , forcing my hips into that position really is agony , not even got started on the exercises yet , lol. They shouldnt be too taxing , subtle stretching of the nerves supplying my hips is the starting point , will try from later today
 

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