"I believe you've been involved in a car accident" ?

I’ve gone down the road of telling the caller that my mate is Nigerian Prince and he wants to call you back. He just needs your bank details and he will transfer the £20mil he needs to get out of the country.
 
Hate these scumbags. Feel the same about most motoring lawyers. Dishonest cunts who rip people off. Disgusting the way most of them operate, of which I have first hand experience. Absolute lowlife. Same goes for many divorce lawyers, although much lower as a percentage than within the ranks of motoring law tbf. There are exceptions I hasten to add!! :-)

And insolvency practitioners. Fucking racket, based on my personal experience. Absolutely disgraceful what goes on there.

The same goes for how disrespectful some professionals can be to the client, who is trusting them implicitly, and upon whom their hopes rest. If the client had paid their bill, then do your absolute best for him or her, within the rules. Anything less is utterly disrespectful. That person is paying good money, that they will have probably worked very hard for, and you should always respect that - many don’t. More cunts.

I hate dishonest professions who don’t play with a straight bat and/or prey on the weak and/or stupid.

Our next door neighbours took us to court once after they broke party wall regulations.

Some of their legal representatives (they used four different firms) were truly awful to us. Bombarding e-mails and constant requests for replies despite receiving them. They all then left the claimants because they clearly weren't being paid.

They ended up using an awful Pro Bono man who could barely speak English. They lost the case and ending up owing £25,000. They'd originally disputed a £500 payment to a surveyor.

It was so stressful it gave me depression.
 
Next time I get this call I’m going to say I sadly died in the crash and you’re talking to a ghost.
I said something similar once, to a guy whose accent sounded as if he was from the sub continent, and called himself Roger. I confirmed I had indeed had an accident 3 years previously. He asked me for details, and I told him it was so bad that I died! His first words were "Oh, I'm very sorry to hear that!"
After I'd finished laughing, I said that irony was obviously not his strong point, and hung up.
 
I said something similar once, to a guy whose accent sounded as if he was from the sub continent, and called himself Roger. I confirmed I had indeed had an accident 3 years previously. He asked me for details, and I told him it was so bad that I died! His first words were "Oh, I'm very sorry to hear that!"
After I'd finished laughing, I said that irony was obviously not his strong point, and hung up.
The only time I’ve come up with a smart arse response was to a PPI salesman. He said ‘Hello sir, have you taken out any loans or credit cards in the last few years?’ and I said no. He asked if I had any bank accounts and I said no so he said where do I keep my money so I said I kept it all under my mattress. He just laughed and that was pretty much call over
 
My wife once replied to the 'I believe you've been involved in a car accident' opener with ... "Actually yes I have. 3 vehicles were involved. I went into the vehicle in front and then another vehicle hit mine from the side. Mind you, I suppose that's to be expected on the Dodgems".
 
Just had another "good morning, I believe you've been involved in a car accident" call.

I thought I'd play along and "yes" was my reply which was followed by a long pause....

"So when were you involved in the car accident"?...... "You tell me seeing as you obviously know I was".... Long pause to hear she put the phone down on me.

Oh well, another number blocked.
my brother in law had a thirty minute conversation with them once, making up absolute bollocks.
my favourite lines were
"i probably shouldnt have had that second spliff"
"lamposts arent as strong as you think"
"of course they are all dead now"
 
my brother in law had a thirty minute conversation with them once, making up absolute bollocks.
my favourite lines were
"i probably shouldnt have had that second spliff"
"lamposts arent as strong as you think"
"of course they are all dead now"
Just had another chancer ring me earlier today.

"Hello, I leave you been involved in an accident, is this right?"..... "Err, hello, yes that's right"..... She then put me onto a guy......"Hello, so when was the accident then sir"?..."Hello, I can't remember when it was, sorry"..... Long pause......."Why can't you remember?"...... Dunno, I must have had a bump on the head or something"..... phone goes dead.


Another number blocked: /
 
Same Chinese bloke phoned me every day this week on my landline with this shit.
 

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