Joke thread

[Lavinda Past]

What am I....?

I start out with mostly whites and some blacks.

I systematically eliminate the whites leaving only some of the RIGHT whites.

So.... what am I?




Paint by numbers

 

[Lavinda Past]

There is a rich man from the middle east who plans to buy all the fish and chip shops in the UK.

His name is Sultan Vinegar

 

[KS55]

There is a rich man from the middle east who plans to buy all the fish and chip shops in the UK.

His name is Sultan Vinegar

Don’t call us, we’ll call you.
I’m sure you can think of something for
Sheik Rattlunrole.

 

[hallsteve62]

I went into an Indian restaurant and asked for a Chicken Chaat.

The waiter replied

"cock-a-doodle-doo - cluck cluck - squawk - cluck - bawk bawk"

This has got to be a new low...

 

[Bluethemaway]

 

[meltonblue]

“Someone’s stolen my grass and you’re asking me why I’m looking forlorn?!”

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[balotellishaircut]

A duck walks into a bar

Got any bread ?

No

Got any bread ?

No

Got any bread ?

No, and if you ask again I’ll nail your beak to the bar

Got any nails ?

No

Got any bread ?