Joke thread

[DrBlueBob]

@BlueMoonAcrossThePond er, I still don't get your lovely joke.

 

[Bill Walker]

Lots of people in Bangladesh don’t like the Flintstones, but those in Abu Dhabi Do

 

[RiversideBlue]

Guy with no arms or legs is sat on a beach when three girls notice him. The first says ' I fell so sorry for that guy with no arms and no legs I'm gonna go and chat to him'. She chats to him for a while then says ' I feel so sorry for you sat here on this beach with no arms and no legs, have you ever been hugged before?' He says no so she picks him up and gives him a big hug and off she goes. The second girl goes over to chat to him " have you ever been kissed before?" "No" he says so she picks him up and gives him a big kiss and off she goes. The last girl comes over to the guy and says "I feel so sorry for you sat here with no arms and no legs, have you ever been fucked before?" " No" he says excitedly "I've ner been fucked before". "Well you are now" she says "the tides coming in!"

 

[Metal Biker]

@BlueMoonAcrossThePond er, I still don't get your lovely joke.

Bartender says "Hey, where did you get that?"

The PARROT says "Mordor... there's loads of them"

The twist is that it's the PARROT who has the ORC, not the Orc that has the Parrot.

It is a very funny joke. Much famous. Very laugh.

 

[DrBlueBob]

Bartender says "Hey, where did you get that?"

The PARROT says "Mordor... there's loads of them"

The twist is that it's the PARROT who has the ORC, not the Orc that has the Parrot.

It is a very funny joke. Much famous. Very laugh.

Ah, thankyou. I did wonder if that was the twist. I heard similar when a bloke goes to the doc with a penguin on his head and when asked what's wrong the penguin says it's about this growth on my foot.

Incidentally; Much famous. Very laugh is going to have me chuckling all day. I'm borrowing that for future ref if that's ok. Actually I'm borrowing it even if you don't approve. :-)

 

[Metal Biker]

Ah, thankyou. I did wonder if that was the twist. I heard similar when a bloke goes to the doc with a penguin on his head and when asked what's wrong the penguin says it's about this growth on my foot.

Incidentally; Much famous. Very laugh is going to have me chuckling all day. I'm borrowing that for future ref if that's ok. Actually I'm borrowing it even if you don't approve. :-)

I don't approve and I actually feel quite violated and persecuted right now...

 

[manchester blue]

I don't approve and I actually feel quite violated and persecuted right now...

I'm still trying to figure out a talking biscuit.

 

[RiversideBlue]

Three United fans walk into a bar. A rapist, a murderer and a thief......and that was just the first of them.

 

[DrBlueBob]

I don't approve and I actually feel quite violated and persecuted right now...

Oh, sorry about that. Slopes off muttering very laugh under my breath.

 

[RiversideBlue]

Bartender says "Hey, where did you get that?"

The PARROT says "Mordor... there's loads of them"

The twist is that it's the PARROT who has the ORC, not the Orc that has the Parrot.

It is a very funny joke. Much famous. Very laugh.

Great joke but surely you need to adapt it for your audience:-

An ugly as fuck, thick as shit bloke walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. "Where did you get that?" asks the bar barman. "Old Trafford" says the parrot "there's thousands of the fuckers!"