Joke thread

[Tuearts right boot]

View attachment 173207

Oh that is so so true...the cars, easy, the clocks in the house, easy, phones and PCs, do it themselves but a 'simple clock' on the oven that no one and I repeat no one uses....will be the death of me.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Oh that is so so true...the cars, easy, the clocks in the house, easy, phones and PCs, do it themselves but a 'simple clock' on the oven that no one and I repeat no one uses....will be the death of me.

Not only that, each time you finally manage to get the time right you think that you’ve got is sussed now, only to have forgotten again in 6 months and you go through the rigmarole again!

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Not only that, each time you finally manage to get the time right you think that you’ve got is sussed now, only to have forgotten again in 6 months and you go through the rigmarole again!

Or....the bloody think turns itself on at some ridiculous hour of the day and you melt the plastic handle on the frying pan, that you put away the day before....

 

[KS55]

View attachment 173207

I acquired a new oven. Its best feature was the clock:
1. Press one button to select the function to be changed e.g. clock, oven on etc.
2. Tap plus or minus to alter setting.
3. Press select button. DONE, one handed, one finger!
Rather beats the previous model which required three fingers simultaneously.

 

[hallsteve62]

I acquired a new oven. Its best feature was the clock:
1. Press one button to select the function to be changed e.g. clock, oven on etc.
2. Tap plus or minus to alter setting.
3. Press select button. DONE, one handed, one finger!
Rather beats the previous model which required three fingers simultaneously.

I knew a girl like that once ...

 

[KS55]

So I got on the bus and made a phone call. I asked the person next to me what year it was. She said it was 2025.
I spoke into my phone: “It works! I’m in 2025.”

 

[sir baconface]

I acquired a new oven. Its best feature was the clock:
1. Press one button to select the function to be changed e.g. clock, oven on etc.
2. Tap plus or minus to alter setting.
3. Press select button. DONE, one handed, one finger!
Rather beats the previous model which required three fingers simultaneously.

Best to avoid any activity requiring more than two fingers.

 

[jimharri]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[Sam101]

My mate poured domestos on our local vicar…


He got done for bleach of the priest

 

[mrcunny]

 

[SCEtoAUX]

I'm not really sure which thread this belongs in but I've just spotted this Tshirt on line.

Anyone fancy one?

View attachment 173260

Oh I want one of those.

 

[NZBlue]

Oh I want one of those.

It's sort of like a half and half scarf I suppose

 

[bluethrunthru]

 

[meltonblue]

My mate failed his aboriginal music exam.

I asked him, “Did you redo it?”

 

[Vienna_70]

My mate failed his aboriginal music exam.

I asked him, “Did you redo it?”

It took me a moment.

And it was better, when I said it aloud.

 

[kippaxneil]

As l get older and remember all the people l've lost along the way, l think to myself....maybe a career as a Tour Guide wasn't for me.

 

[sir baconface]