Life is tough. Another drunken post.

Thanks guys for the great advice and support. I'm going on vacation tomorrow so I'll hopefully see the brighter side of life through that. And I've a therapist appointment soon after I return.

I got to stop posting when drunk (doh!). It's not a dependency yet but I do turn to it every so often to fight my mind racing and as a sort of act of protest (like a crazy scream into the night or punching a wall - if that makes sense). I'm so responsible though in general that I would be very surprised if I overdid it too much.

Thanks again guys. :-)
 
TonyM said:
I'm really struggling lately. Drunk as a skunk now drinking gin to put off going to bed and hours of anxiety. Life is hard as of the past year or so. I've kids so I have to find ways to keep going ...but how? It's worse than the Sterling or Mahrez dilemmas that I go on about in my day to day on here. :-)

Maybe we need a mental health forum for exclamations of drunken ( or preferably sober) angst. Or not. Sorry.

Maybe best to ignore me or just delete this post. This isn't the first time.

That said if anyone else is struggling....let me know because you aren't alone!!!
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I know where you are coming from, I have to balance my work life with caring for an ageing Dad (88) who is doing less and less for himself and becoming more demanding. He's now causing friction between him and Mrs H, I'm stuck in the middle and having to act like a peace broker at times. On Father's Day we took him to our local for an evening meal, he just moaned about everything including the "chips were too fat" and was generally in a cantankerous mood. I can't not look after him but I fear for my own health as I'm not looking after myself like I should as I just don't have time to do so and I'm 62. I like a drink but like you I sometimes go over the top, as others have pointed out it's not the answer and I'm having a period off after this weekend. I can fully empathise with you.
 
Hard to advise without know the full circumstances but all I can say is try to cut back on the drinking if you can, try to eat healthy food, try to take some exercise and cut out of your life any people who you feel have a negative affect on your wellbeing.
 
well, what's making you anxious? What's on your mind that's stressing you?

Stop drinking and staying up till 2am, there's a start. You need to change your cope.

Only you can turn it around, people can offer you advice and listen but you need to want to change. The biggest return on investment is the work you put into yourself and it's the most certain return you'll ever get.
 
hammocity said:
I know where you are coming from, I have to balance my work life with caring for an ageing Dad (88) who is doing less and less for himself and becoming more demanding. He's now causing friction between him and Mrs H, I'm stuck in the middle and having to act like a peace broker at times. On Father's Day we took him to our local for an evening meal, he just moaned about everything including the "chips were too fat" and was generally in a cantankerous mood. I can't not look after him but I fear for my own health as I'm not looking after myself like I should as I just don't have time to do so and I'm 62. I like a drink but like you I sometimes go over the top, as others have pointed out it's not the answer and I'm having a period off after this weekend. I can fully empathise with you.
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Fat chips - oh ffs! ;-)
 
hammocity said:
I know where you are coming from, I have to balance my work life with caring for an ageing Dad (88) who is doing less and less for himself and becoming more demanding. He's now causing friction between him and Mrs H, I'm stuck in the middle and having to act like a peace broker at times. On Father's Day we took him to our local for an evening meal, he just moaned about everything including the "chips were too fat" and was generally in a cantankerous mood. I can't not look after him but I fear for my own health as I'm not looking after myself like I should as I just don't have time to do so and I'm 62. I like a drink but like you I sometimes go over the top, as others have pointed out it's not the answer and I'm having a period off after this weekend. I can fully empathise with you.
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will sound harsh, but the more you do for him that he could still technically do himself, the more he'll take from you. Breeding the entitlement you're now experiencing when he goes out. Think you need to draw a line between what he actually can't do and could do but is making you miserable by getting to do for him.

If you don't look after yourself first then you're the one who will suffer the most. They're all doing alright on the back of using you to prop themselves up. Doesn't mean not caring and doing your bit to support, but in the context of looking after yourself first.
 
PannickAtTheDisco said:
will sound harsh, but the more you do for him that he could still technically do himself, the more he'll take from you. Breeding the entitlement you're now experiencing when he goes out. Think you need to draw a line between what he actually can't do and could do but is making you miserable by getting to do for him.

If you don't look after yourself first then you're the one who will suffer the most. They're all doing alright on the back of using you to prop themselves up. Doesn't mean not caring and doing your bit to support, but in the context of looking after yourself first.
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You have just echoed exactly what one of my close friends said, my sister calls twice a week so I get Thursdays and Mondays off so the rest of the week I'm round there cooking and cleaning, having meals with him, doing his shopping, running him to his medical appointments, etc. It's going to have have to stop, thanks for your post.
 
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