Lighten up, it's The City joke thread..........:-))

This is the spirit, it's good to see some blues still have the famous, self-depricative, typical City sense of humour!

Q: What do a Man City player and someone on the dole have in common?

A: They're lazy and get paid for doing fuck all.

(NOTE: I am currently on the dole, so don't take offence!)
 
At the end of the season, the Chairman was asking the players where they were going for their holidays.

Barbados, Florida, Italy, Greece, they all shouted.

One player did'nt say anything though, so after the excitement had died down, he went up to him and asked him again 'Where are you going on holiday?.

'Blackpool'

'Blackpool? You earn millions every year, you can go wherever you want to, and you want to go to Blackpool?'

'Yeah, I know, but just once in my life, I want a ride in an open top bus!.
 
Fowlers Penalty Miss said:
At the end of the season, the Chairman was asking the players where they were going for their holidays.

Barbados, Florida, Italy, Greece, they all shouted.

One player did'nt say anything though, so after the excitement had died down, he went up to him and asked him again 'Where are you going on holiday?.

'Blackpool'

'Blackpool? You earn millions every year, you can go wherever you want to, and you want to go to Blackpool?'

'Yeah, I know, but just once in my life, I want a ride in an open top bus!.
Click to expand...


rofl.gif
 
Roberto Mancini has his scouting team all over the world, but recieve's a phone call from one that takes his attention.

The scout is out in Iraq looking at the young talent in a club match. He spots this 16 year old playing upfront, who has scored a hat trick in the first 5 minutes. By half time tha lad has scored all 9 of his teams goals.

The scout phone's Mancio, "Bobby, Bobby. Your not going to believe it! I've found a wonderkid out in Iraq. He's 16 and scored 9 goals in the first half. We have to sign him."

Mancini agrees to give the youngster a trial, is impressed and signs him during the transfer window.

Injuries take their toll on City, who have made the FA Cup final against United. And only have 1 fit recognised striker. So Mancini decides to put the young lad on the bench. With 5 minutes to go in the game City are losing 1-0 and Adebayor has come off injured.

Roberto turns round to the young Iraqi and says, "Right son, its your time. Go and make a name for yourself."

The 16 year old runs onto the field and with his first touch scores the equaliser. 5 minutes later, City have won 3-1 with the young Iraqi scoring a hat trick. The fans are chanting his name, all the City players have him up on their shoulders.

He gets down and runs down the tunnel at Wembley. Gets to his phone and calls his Mum.

"Mum, Mum, your never going to believe it. Im a hero. I scored a hat trick on my debut, won City the FA Cup, scored with my first touch and everyone is chanting my name."

He here's his mum sobbing on the other end of the line. He says, "Is everything alright mum?"

His mum replies, "No, your dad has been murdered, and your sister has been raped and kidnapped."

The Iraqi says, "Mum, i dont know what to say. Im so sorry"

His mum replies, "So you should be you little wanker. It was your idea to move to Manchester"
 
Apparently at the Liverpool game on sunday 6 City fans were arrested trying to climb over the wall.

The police returned them to their seats and made them watch the rest of the game like everyone else.
 
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