Rag Jokes!!!

[LCBblue]

Well you must have some, I'll start:

A vey religious catholic boy who happens to be a City fan, went to Rome to see the pope. On Friday night the Pope cam through the streets of Rome, preaching to people. When suddenly he saw a small boy in a Manchester United shirt. He stopped, put his hand on the boys shoulder and whispered something in his ear.

The little boy pushed through the crowd to get closer, and see if the Pope said anything to him. He didn't. So the City fan goes back to his hotel devastated. So the next day, in a desperate attempt to get some recognition from the Pope, the boy puts on a Man United shirt, just to see if he gets noticed.

So he pushes through the crowd once more, and the Pope stops, puts his hand on the boys shoulder, and says, "I though I told you yesterday, **** off back to London"!

Anybody got any others?? Let me hear them....

 

[kingmikedoyle]

Well you must have some, I'll start:

A vey religious catholic boy who happens to be a City fan, went to Rome to see the pope. On Friday night the Pope cam through the streets of Rome, preaching to people. When suddenly he saw a small boy in a Manchester United shirt. He stopped, put his hand on the boys shoulder and whispered something in his ear.

The little boy pushed through the crowd to get closer, and see if the Pope said anything to him. He didn't. So the City fan goes back to his hotel devastated. So the next day, in a desperate attempt to get some recognition from the Pope, the boy puts on a Man United shirt, just to see if he gets noticed.

So he pushes through the crowd once more, and the Pope stops, puts his hand on the boys shoulder, and says, "I though I told you yesterday, **** off back to London"!

Anybody got any others?? Let me hear them....

the whole fucking club is a rather sick joke!!

 

[jimharri]

It has been announced that British Summer Time will from now on be phased in. Instead of adding a whole hour in one go, five minutes will be added to ManUre games where they need a late goal.

 

[LCBblue]

It has been announced that British Summer Time will from now on be phased in. Instead of adding a whole hour in one go, five minutes will be added to ManUre games where they need a late goal.

I like that one mate, well played, ;)

 

[jimharri]

So Howard Webb has admitted that he shouldn't have given Utd the penalty that let them back into the game against Spurs.
When asked why he changed his mind he replied, "The cheque bounced."

 

[LCBblue]

What do you call a rag with half brain?









Gifted ; )

 

[i8therags]

A very intelligent bloke goes to the doctor.He says to the doc I;m sick of lifes presure and I want to reduce my IQ so as to enjoy life more.The doc gave him a pill and told him to come back next week.he did and the bloke said"its working to some extent but I still need to reduce it more.Another week and another pill he says"fink its gettin there but need more".Another week and another pill he says "fink need more"Another week and pill,doc says how are you,bloke said "uniy-ed uniy-ed uniy-ed".

 

[kriskrak]

Whats the difference between a United fan and a Dildo?

The United fan is the real prick!

 

[2sheikhs]

The difference between a dead dog lying in the road and a dead rag lying in the road????????Theres skid marks in front of the dog.

 

[LCBblue]

The difference between a dead dog lying in the road and a dead rag lying in the road????????Theres skid marks in front of the dog.

I started this thread because this United fan I know is giving me grief and how they have got 80 mil to spend! Im gonna get him good with some of these, cheers fellas, keep em coming!