Stupid things football people say on TV

"We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us." - RUUD GULLIT

"I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock." -BARRY VENISON

"My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7." - DAVID BECKHAM

"I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league." - MARK VIDUKA

"If you don't believe you can win, there is no point in getting out of bed at the end of the day." - NEVILLE SOUTHALL

"I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel." - STUART PEARCE

"I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona." - MARK DRAPER

"One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best." - ALAN SHEARER

"All that remains is for a few dots and commas to be crossed." - MITCHELL THOMAS

"Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us the match." - IAN WRIGHT

"Germany are a very difficult team to play...they had 11 internationals out there today." - STEVE LOMAS

"I've had 14 bookings this season - 8 of which were my fault, but 7 of which were disputable." - PAUL GASCOIGNE
 
Ron Manager:
Oh, those Brazilians, you know? Circa 1970? Broke the mould. Theory out the window. Free expression of football. Uncategorisable. Is that a word? It is now! You know? Far cry from small boys in the park, jumpers for goalposts. Rush goalie. Two at the back, three in the middle, four up front, one's gone home for his tea. Beans on toast? Possibly, don't quote me on that. Marvellous.

Everytime i read the formation i crack-up 2-3-4 up front...
 
I hate it when a player gets sent off in the 90th minute, and every single report of the game says "Man City beat 10-man West Brom." as if they would've got the 3 goals back if they had the extra man for 3 more minutes.
 
'He really couldn't have hit that better' (said after the ball comes back off the crossbar).

...or when a player misses and they say 'unlucky'. It's not unlucky at all - he didn't score because he didn't hit it well enough.
 
"I've been consistent in patches this season" - THEO WALCOTT

"I look forward to hearing from the silent majority" - ALEX McLEISH

"I haven't seen it, but it looks generous" - ARSENE WENGER

"Whoever you support, you've got that blood in your veins" - PHIL NEAL

"Paolo Di Canio is one picnic short of a hamper" - ALAN BRAZIL

"If we'd kept a clean sheet tonight, we'd have won 1-0" - STEVE COTTERILL, AFTER FOREST LOST 2-1

"They can push the bat a little bit more than others at that level" - STEVE CLARIDGE

"In the end, Rosicky initially did well" - ANDY TOWNSEND

"He's been like a fresh of breath air" - ROY KEANE

"The thing about goalscorers is that they score goals" - TONY COTTEE

"I don't want Rooney to leave these shores but if he does, I think he'll go abroad" - IAN WRIGHT

"Belgium are outside dark favourites to win the group" - IAIN DOWIE

"Six yards out and Wheater headers it over" - PAUL MERSON

"Luis Suarez is a victim of his own make-up" - MICKY QUINN

"Matt Taylor ran half the length of the field, width-wise" - IAN ABRAHAMS

"The last six games of the Invincibles season were the most pressurised, because we were under pressure" - RAY PARLOUR

"I feel sorry for Wolves at the moment but not sorry for them" - DAVID PLEAT

"Sometimes you want Obertan to open his legs and do something a bit exciting" - ALAN PARDEW
 
asxtc said:
"I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel." - STUART PEARCE

Didn't he say that after seeing Jasper coming onto the pitch at Wembley?
Click to expand...
Another classic Stuart Pearce:

"I think we have all been headbutted in the face at sometime in life."

And that was when he was our manager.
 
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