The Greengrocer's Apostrophe

Didsbury Dave

Well-Known Member
Joined
1 Feb 2007
Messages
38,063
I have no patience or tolerence for the Greengrocer's Apostrophe. In fact I would go so far as to say it should be a criminal offence. It is a blight on our green and pleasant land, in fact, and a sad indictment of our education system.

They are everywhere. I have even taken to killing boredom when out with the family by looking for them.

The British capital of the Greengrocer's Apostrophe is Skegness, in my experience. My wife likes to go as it is near her Mum's and reminds her of her childhood. You get the obvious handwritten "Deckchair's" and "Cold Drink's" but I would say nearly half of the shops have them in their permanent, expensive signs. "Fish and Chip's", "Sunhat's", you name it. They are everywhere.

When I see these signs I always wonder if the chap who made the sign knows what he's doing. Is he blindly following instructions, or is he illiterate? I saw some the other day on a road sign! Several of them. This was at Bolton N Services on the M61 for anyone who doesn't believe me. "HGV's" it said, with an arrow. And "Car's" with another. State sponsored stupidity.

I would advocate capital punishment for these offenders, these criminals who ruin our beautiful language. If it's a hand written sign, your common or garden "Tomatoe's" or "potatoe's", then a slap on the wrist and maybe an English class or two may suffice.

But for these people who immortalise their illiteracy with permanent signs...I'd advocate having them banned from running business in future. Maybe a couple of weeks in prison too.

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Far, far, FAR worse than this are the half-wits who don't know the difference between "have" and "of".

I should of... NO you fucking dimwits , it's I should HAVE.

What the fuck do they teach kids nowadays?

And breathe...
 
Soulboy said:
Far, far, FAR worse than this are the half-wits who don't know the difference between "have" and "of".

I should of... NO you fucking dimwits , it's I should HAVE.

What the fuck do they teach kids nowadays?

And breathe...

That's an irritating one, but it isn't permanently erected in 4 foot, illuminated letters as a permanent headstone for the English language.
 
Lark Lane Blue said:
I have noticed it appearing in the 20 pizza menu's that fall through my letterbox every day.
They're great for learning all the new spellings too
Only this morning I got one offering me a "goasts cheese pizza" for £6.

I hope you're being ironic, mate.

You'll say you were even if you weren't, of course.
 
Zin 'messiah' Zimmer said:
What about the use of their/there/they're in a appropriate sentence...... i believe an epidemic has spread like a virus across our shores, i blame the Irish.

There out of control these paddy's ;) lmao
 
Didsbury Dave said:
Lark Lane Blue said:
I have noticed it appearing in the 20 pizza menu's that fall through my letterbox every day.
They're great for learning all the new spellings too
Only this morning I got one offering me a "goasts cheese pizza" for £6.

I hope you're being ironic, mate.

You'll say you were even if you weren't, of course.


I was Dave I swear it!
 

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