Touring caravans

[hilts]

Bump! My good lady has decided that since we haven’t had a holiday in 10 years we are buying a caravan. We have a ford turneo (9 seater transit) that she’s had a tow bar fitted to, and now we’re on the lookout for a caravan-I’m lost and scared you don’t seem to get much for the money. I bought a damp meter and that’s already saved us on a couple of vans, but I’m losing my will to live…

Just tell her she will have to do all the driving, that will put a stop to it.

Or just grow a pair and say no:-)

 

[TheBlueDune]

As Victoria Wood said, there's something odd about people that want to take a washing up brush on holiday

 

[Tuearts right boot]

As Victoria Wood said, there's something odd about people that want to take a washing up brush on holiday

You do, however, get the chance to discuss A roads with like minded people.

 

[Bill Walker]

Just tell her she will have to do all the driving, that will put a stop to it.

Or just grow a pair and say no:-)

And refuse to empty the bog.

 

[Two Gun Bob]

Used to have a touring caravan...never again.
It all starts so easy and cheap.

Then you realise you know nothing about towing/caravanning.
I don't mean the dragging around bit.

First off is the "nose weight". Get that wrong and you will be a nodding donkey.
In English that means you have to load the caravan up in a way that the tow hitch is a certain weight.
To heavy or too light brings big problems.

So you buy a nose weight scale.

Then you buy a anti snake stabiliser system. It only takes one severe wiggle to justify the price!

Then you buy little pads for the caravan levelling legs so they don't sink into the ground.

Then you have to buy little ramps to adjust the caravan on uneven ground.

The wife then wants an awning to attach to the side. No not that cheap one, yes the really expensive one.
Oh and add in a awning floor liner. Table chairs and heater.

Then you need a little step to get into the caravan.

Gas?, did i mention buy some gas?

Then there is the portable satellite dish/TV aerial.

Next up will be a caravan motor mover. You don't really need one, but boy it sure does impress your neighbours twice a year when it moves your caravan ten feet off the drive.

There are many many more things than listed above, but you get the gist.

Then the thing can sit on your drive day after day. It just gets dirty so you have to keep cleaning it. Problem is it isn't normal dirt. Caravans develop weird "black streaks". They are a bastard to get off and reappear just days later anyway!

When you finally have all the gear and you arrive at you caravan park, the fun begins right?
No, you will spend the next few hours levelling/adjusting and fettling the thing. Then she will insist the awning is put up. Basically forget the first day. You will be knackered from towing and setting up.

And then it will happen........you WILL have forgotten something vital.
It will normally be the blue hook up lead to connect your van to the electric supply.
I think i aged ten years in the two years we owned one.

Honestly, just pay for a static or go abroad in a hotel. I never moan about the price any more!

I've experienced towing caravan ownership, but for the above reasons baled due to a low patience threshold

If we go caravanning we now rent statics for pennies outside of school holidays. Cornwall Peran Sands at the beginning of October for 7 luxurious days at just over a ton for two, although it will hold six so do the sums. Cracking beach on the doorstep and near to Newquay for day trips etc etc etc.

But if it rocks your world and it really does for a lot of folk then fair does and amen, as were all built different.

As an addendum you wouldn't catch me under canvas either, as that's for natural born adventures and the Bear Grill types amongst us that are devoid of any moral compass.

Whatever next ... A foxhole in Mons?

 

[bluethrunthru]

Did the locals not set your van on fire? You were lucky. Go to the Lake District next time.

Or go to the south coast - a campervan or caravan is really handy - one of you can drive whilst the other one gets some kip as you sit in the never ending traffic jams - that will be mostly your "holiday".

The great irony will be that an awful lot of the jams are the result of other caravanners and camper van owners clogging up the roads

 

[Bill Walker]

As an addedum you would not catch my arse under canvas either, as that's for natural born adventures and the bear grill typos among us that are devoid of moral compass.

Whatever next ... A foxhole in Mons?

Took my kids camping once when they were little boys. All good, arrived in brilliant sunshine, pitched tent etc.
Then that night it started pissing down. Ahh well, tents waterproof, (it's not from Aldi). Got up next morning after about 1 hour sleep, although it didn't leak everything felt damp as fuck.
Crawled outside, grass piss wet through, tbh I didn't know what to do next. clothes felt damp, lads moaning about being hungry, had Weetabix but the milk didn't taste good.
Shoes got wet walking around the wet grass, just felt miserable as fuck, lasted the weekend, totally knackered through lack of sleep, grubby as fuck and couldn't wait to get home.
Never again Hahahaha

 

[Two Gun Bob]

Took my kids camping once when they were little boys. All good, arrived in brilliant sunshine, pitched tent etc.
Then that night it started pissing down. Ahh well, tents waterproof, (it's not from Aldi). Got up next morning after about 1 hour sleep, although it didn't leak everything felt damp as fuck.
Crawled outside, grass piss wet through, tbh I didn't know what to do next. clothes felt damp, lads moaning about being hungry, had Weetabix but the milk didn't taste good.
Shoes got wet walking around the wet grass, just felt miserable as fuck, lasted the weekend, totally knackered through lack of sleep, grubby as fuck and couldn't wait to get home.
Never again Hahahaha

 

[Bill Walker]

I said to the kids, if you go camping again, it'll be with the Scouts. :)

 

[ganganvince]

Having just spent close on £2,500 for 10 days in Whitby I thought fuck that so have just bought a 2nd hand touring caravan it’s mint, £90 a year insurance and £20-£25 a night to pitch up. It’s immaculate inside got a bargain can’t wait to hit the road we usually go away 10 times in the uk a year so will pay for itself with today’s holiday accommodation prices anyone else use one also best places to visit will be great thanks

Still using it?