United thread 2020/21

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oldhamblue said:
I was at a little soiree yesterday afternoon where a rag medical staff member was in attendance. Most of the in laws are rags and hang on his every word as he holds court with tales about "the gaffer" (GPC), "eric the king" and "little scholesy". He was talking about Cuntona and said "the gaffer always had the eye for a player". I said "like Bebe? Kleberson, Djemba Djemba, Tiaibi?" Brother in law says just ignore him he's a blue.
Talk came round to Kane and he says rags would have to be interested if he's available. Someone says he's done a recent interview citing Kevin De Bruyne as someone he'd love to play in the same team as. So the rag staff member says, and I quote "Bruno Fernandes can do everything De Bruyne can do". There was an interminable pause. Possibly people trying to comprehend if he was serious but I suspect everyone in that room knew I was about to unleash profanity. I said "are you fucking serious?" "that cheating goofy bastard isn't fit to lace Kev's boots" after which I was ushered away from him

Wife's still not speaking to me
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I know a doctor who works for them in quite a high position and he is a very, very bitter individual. What are the initials of your guy?
 
oldhamblue said:
I was at a little soiree yesterday afternoon where a rag medical staff member was in attendance. Most of the in laws are rags and hang on his every word as he holds court with tales about "the gaffer" (GPC), "eric the king" and "little scholesy". He was talking about Cuntona and said "the gaffer always had the eye for a player". I said "like Bebe? Kleberson, Djemba Djemba, Tiaibi?" Brother in law says just ignore him he's a blue.
Talk came round to Kane and he says rags would have to be interested if he's available. Someone says he's done a recent interview citing Kevin De Bruyne as someone he'd love to play in the same team as. So the rag staff member says, and I quote "Bruno Fernandes can do everything De Bruyne can do". There was an interminable pause. Possibly people trying to comprehend if he was serious but I suspect everyone in that room knew I was about to unleash profanity. I said "are you fucking serious?" "that cheating goofy bastard isn't fit to lace Kev's boots" after which I was ushered away from him

Wife's still not speaking to me
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Haha well said. My missus has to put a lead on me if we are going to anything she knows there will be rags or dippers there. I find it VERY difficult to listen to their shite and not respond in the appropriate way ;)
 
12 points you scummy twats.

Oh, and you cheated like fuck. All those penalties.....cheating fucking scum bastards.

All you have left is documentaries about your past. You are a bunch of fucking has-been fannies. You have become everything you ridiculed and more. To be honest even losing to you now is less painful - I never thought I'd hear myself say that. I still hate losing to you, but now that we're on a different footballing planet you are just irrelevant to us as a team.

Go take a dive in a fucking 12 foot deep cess pool you cünts....take Neville and Giggs with you while you're there.
 
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