Wayne Rooney - an unemployed Scouser (p56)

He really is a stupid ****.

Agrees to do a PR gig where Plymouth fans pay £40 to meet him. Cries off on the day saying his I'll whilst posting pictures of himself drinking at a Christmas market on Instagram.
Anyone willing to pay £40 to have a photo taken with Wayne Rooney deserves to be mugged off, frankly.
 
Typical fat pissheads action.

I remember being at Norwich watching City and there were loads of London lads in the hotel bar we went in for drinks near the ground.

Turns out they were spurs lads who had the same problem with 'an evening with Gazza' that he'd cancelled that day.
 
Getting cucked by Lampard now. This is probably the end of the Shrek era in Devon.
 

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