Welcome Erling Haaland | Signing confirmed on a 5 year deal

Status
Not open for further replies.
I want an overcast sky, sombre people with umbrellas in dark clothes. We realise we are at Southern Cemetery and a group of mourners are huddled around a grave. We look closer and see the grave stone reads "RIP Premier League". Suddenly a hand is punching up from the ground like in that film that time and Erling emerges from the grave. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao whilst the mourners run away screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or we have a Norwegian landscape. An isolated castle with thunder and lightening. We cut to an interior shot with a mad scientist type guy pulling levers and looking at science type stuff. Outside we see a group of people with torches and pitchforks all wearing replica kits from epl teams. Inside again and the scientist pulls one final lever screaming "he's alive". Outside with the crowd we see the front of the castle door open and Erling emerges. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao whilst the villagers run away screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or we have and adventure scene. An explorer that looks a little like VvD is walking through ruins brushing aside spider webs and swinging across holes using a whip. He reaches a large room with a dusty looking premier League trophy on a plinth. Blowing on his fingers he quickly snatches the trophy and replaces it with a bag of self righteous sand. The explorer looks pleased with himself until the bag descends into the plinth and the room he is in starts to collapse. The explorer franticly retraces his steps until we feel a rumble and shaking. The explorer looks behind and sees Erling chasing him. We cut to an exterior shot of the temple. It's peaceful and serene until Erling bursts out. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao and raises the trophy screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or he's sat at a piano playing the ha ha ha ha Haaland song. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

#announceHalaand
 
I really hope he doesn’t take that 15. Prefer him to build his own story. We might not learn his number today though
 
mrbelfry said:
I want an overcast sky, sombre people with umbrellas in dark clothes. We realise we are at Southern Cemetery and a group of mourners are huddled around a grave. We look closer and see the grave stone reads "RIP Premier League". Suddenly a hand is punching up from the ground like in that film that time and Erling emerges from the grave. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao whilst the mourners run away screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or we have a Norwegian landscape. An isolated castle with thunder and lightening. We cut to an interior shot with a mad scientist type guy pulling levers and looking at science type stuff. Outside we see a group of people with torches and pitchforks all wearing replica kits from epl teams. Inside again and the scientist pulls one final lever screaming "he's alive". Outside with the crowd we see the front of the castle door open and Erling emerges. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao whilst the villagers run away screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or we have and adventure scene. An explorer that looks a little like VvD is walking through ruins brushing aside spider webs and swinging across holes using a whip. He reaches a large room with a dusty looking premier League trophy on a plinth. Blowing on his fingers he quickly snatches the trophy and replaces it with a bag of self righteous sand. The explorer looks pleased with himself until the bag descends into the plinth and the room he is in starts to collapse. The explorer franticly retraces his steps until we feel a rumble and shaking. The explorer looks behind and sees Erling chasing him. We cut to an exterior shot of the temple. It's peaceful and serene until Erling bursts out. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao and raises the trophy screaming. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

Or he's sat at a piano playing the ha ha ha ha Haaland song. He chugs a can of sweet Carabao. Then he volleys Roy Keane's head into the camera.

#announceHalaand
Click to expand...
Jeez City should sign you up!

You don't currently work in sales for Carabao by any chance! :-)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.