What is the most pathetic excuse ever?

[CatMan]

This cake thing got me thinking what is the most pathetic excuse used in football to justify a situation?

Here's a couple of the top of my head.

1. United players couldn't see each other whilst wearing grey shirts and subsequently were walloped at Southampton.

2. Balotelli was allergic to grass!

There has got to be more, but both the above pale into insignificance compared to Yaya's cake!

Help me out and give us all a laugh.

 

[Damocles]

2. Balotelli was allergic to grass!

Balotelli, like many other people in the world including numerous top level footballers, was allergic to the synthetic grass that they used on the pitch and broke out in rashes all over his body. This wasn't a "pathetic excuse"

 

[aguero93:20]

3. It wasn't us, there were Chelsea fans hidden in with our supporters.
4. They spat on the memorial.

 

[Dipsis_LTU_MC]

I don't think that it is an excuse but I read somewhere:

Real Madrid can buy player for 40mln because they have a rich history. Man City can't because their history isn't so rich.

 

[Wio Gumflapdinand]

Stephen Ireland's dead grannies

 

[M18CTID]

Not many can match "Cakegate" but Charles N'Zogbia leaving Newcastle because he was insulted at Kinnear calling him Charles Insomnia comes close!

 

[feedthegoat]

Fergiescum not doing an interview after the Munich memorial game because he had to catch a plane to scout a player.

 

[Kakhaber Tskhadadze K.O.T.A.]

Fergiescum claiming to have a bowel problem when caught by the police speeding down the hard shoulder.

<a class="postlink" href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/465718.stm" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/465718.stm</a>

 

[I'm With Stupid]

"I swear she told me she was 42." - Wayne Rooney

 

[Dirty Harry]

Kevin Horlock, sent off for 'walking aggressively'.