World has been turned upside down!

[StrangewaysHereWeCome]

. As you do

 

[Challenger1978]

Listen to this man.

Only thing I'll add on to that is lie through your teeth and make her sound like a woman from hell.


Tell the solicitor this isn't the first time she's messed around. She's also violent towards you and your scared even though she's never hit the kids without you around for her to hit you're worried she may hit them in a fit of rage. Also claim this fella she's seeing has threatened you with violence (do you know who he is).

In fact next time she goes to work get someone to twat you with a cricket bat or something so your marked up. Then get the locks changed and phone the police up and report the woman. Get it sorted with your solicitor though so you can get an injunction on her and get a custody order for the kids at the same time.

Also if you have a joint bank account empty the bloody thing. Also cash in any savings you can and keep it as cold hard cash (stash it at your mams), basically keep nothing in a bank.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Blueboy Danny I'm going to give you this straight worse case scenario is she gets the house. She moves in this other bloke and fucks him senseless in your bed. She also has your kids calling this other bloke daddy. On top of that you lose a big chunk of your wages to the CSA and end up stuck living in a shitty bedsit without a pot to piss in.

I've seen it happen to many a bloke fella don't let it happen to you. Strike first and strike hard and make sure you get the best deal for yourself. Also don't let her know whats coming be a proper sly bastard about it make her think you want her back while you work on this. Then when everything has settled on your terms you can try to be friendly and reasonable.

NOTE: Do not believe a word about her only fucking this bloke since the miscarriage. She could be lying through her teeth and could of been fucking this guy for a long time. Christ she might of only admitted to you she was fucking about because the other guy forced her hand.

Man have you got issues. glad I don't know you.

Me too

Bob if your bloke fucked about on you I'd offer you the same advice. This isn't a man v women thing this is me just trying to help out a blue. I know it's a shitty and horrible thing to do but that's how the world really works. If there's a good chance someone is going to fuck you over royally and ruin your life. Get in their first fuck them over royally and look after yourself and your loved ones first.

Life isn't a game of cricket after all.

 

[Blueboy Danny]

Just spoke with the misuses, very emotional, she is now saying she wants to make ago of it however I have told her no chance, too much lies and decit and subsequent mistrust, she know I won't budge on this and we have spoke about how the divorce should go, she has agreed to split everything 50/50 including custody, she knows she has fucked up and knows its too late, we have agreed that the house will be sold and we will find separate accommodation, not moving out just yet, gonna get some advice and camp up in the spare room for now. Feel much better after talking with her, everything seems a little clearer, she feels like shit but tuff it's her doing. Thanks to everyone who have offer their support and advice, this is by no means over but you have all been a great source of support, event the more knee jerky ones amongst you, you have at least brought a much needed smile to my face.

Mate I'm not trying to shit stir or out but why are you in the spare room ?

She's the one that cheated and is in the wrong, shouldn't she be the one to piss off in to the spare room ?

I've already said. she belongs in the snakes room.
Well? Don't she?

To be honest I'll get a better nights sleep in there as our eldest tends to sneak his way in what was our bed in the middle of the night and I end up with a foot in the face.

 

[Pigeonho]

Just woke up in a puddle of fucking wine and have traced the last post I remember back to 10 fucking 15. Christ.

Fuck her off to the spare room. You be cozy in the main bed. Also, your eldest will wonder what you're doing in there. Well let your ex explain why she's having to camp out in there instead.

City v the welsh today, OP, so have a right good fucking swill and put the past few days aside for a bit.

Right, best clean up my mess and change my clothes like some soiled fucking baby.

 

[dronefromsector7g]

Just woke up in a puddle of fucking wine and have traced the last post I remember back to 10 fucking 15. Christ.

Fuck her off to the spare room. You be cozy in the main bed. Also, your eldest will wonder what you're doing in there. Well let your ex explain why she's having to camp out in there instead.

City v the welsh today, OP, so have a right good fucking swill and put the past few days aside for a bit.

Right, best clean up my mess and change my clothes like some soiled fucking baby.

This post IS the Cellar, part serious advice, part alcohol capering.

 

[the mystery illness]

my mrs did this when our kids were 2 , 4 & 6 , it took 4 years to get to get my head together. i made a decision straight away to stay amicable , and that meant me eating shit and smiling through it , even though inside i was ready to kill. those around me were waiting for me to snap too but i knew this would cost me everything including my beautiful children. even though i was having some very dark thoughts , and pretty much in despair. over the years i had bought rental properties ( before we got together) and built up a good business , i consulted two solicitors , they both said the same , she gets the house , kids , half of any assets & business , i pay any debts /mortgage/bills as she has custody and can't work. (bedsit loomed , unfuckingbelievable)
i cashed all in except the marital home , didn't go to work for 18 months and instead looked after my kids while she was out partying and pissing it up the wall , bought her a gaf she liked , sold it when she was bored with it and bought her one round the corner from me.
we now share custody , it's still amicable (and easier to be so) , i have lost a lot of material things but i now realize that they mean nothing.
my relationship with my kids is nothing less than an unbreakable bond , i look at her now
and although i'll always have feelings for her i know i could never trust her again ( i watch her lie her way through life every fucking day)

HER dad said to me at the beginning of the break up "how much do you think divorce will cost you ?" , i replied what ii thought (in monetary terms) , and he replied "you'll look back in 5 years and think that was cheap if it had have been double. and he was right.
as you state mate , it's not about the money , it;s all about you children and how they are affected , you do what you think is best for them and you , wear your hard hat cos she will throw shit at you along the way , especially when she comes crawling back and you knock her back ( you'll probably rattle her a couple of times along the way , i did , but i thought if everyone else was then i was too)
you'll come out of it at some point and be stronger and feel better for it . it will change you , but stay strong and it will change you for the right reasons , you;ll look back at some point and see her for what she really is , and realize that shes done you a big favour.

keep it together mate , doesn't matter what you do , she thinks she can do what she wants , let her. steer your own ship , go and see your gp , talk to him (stress can fuck you up so fill him in on whats going on so he can keep an eye on you health wise , you might think thats daft but your boys need you , pleaase stay strong and don't bottle it up , things will get better , and although it feels the opposite , you'll come out the other side
and be happy.

good luck blue.

 

[Bill]

my mrs did this when our kids were 2 , 4 & 6 , it took 4 years to get to get my head together. i made a decision straight away to stay amicable , and that meant me eating shit and smiling through it , even though inside i was ready to kill. those around me were waiting for me to snap too but i knew this would cost me everything including my beautiful children. even though i was having some very dark thoughts , and pretty much in despair. over the years i had bought rental properties ( before we got together) and built up a good business , i consulted two solicitors , they both said the same , she gets the house , kids , half of any assets & business , i pay any debts /mortgage/bills as she has custody and can't work. (bedsit loomed , unfuckingbelievable)
i cashed all in except the marital home , didn't go to work for 18 months and instead looked after my kids while she was out partying and pissing it up the wall , bought her a gaf she liked , sold it when she was bored with it and bought her one round the corner from me.
we now share custody , it's still amicable (and easier to be so) , i have lost a lot of material things but i now realize that they mean nothing.
my relationship with my kids is nothing less than an unbreakable bond , i look at her now
and although i'll always have feelings for her i know i could never trust her again ( i watch her lie her way through life every fucking day)

HER dad said to me at the beginning of the break up "how much do you think divorce will cost you ?" , i replied what ii thought (in monetary terms) , and he replied "you'll look back in 5 years and think that was cheap if it had have been double. and he was right.
as you state mate , it's not about the money , it;s all about you children and how they are affected , you do what you think is best for them and you , wear your hard hat cos she will throw shit at you along the way , especially when she comes crawling back and you knock her back ( you'll probably rattle her a couple of times along the way , i did , but i thought if everyone else was then i was too)
you'll come out of it at some point and be stronger and feel better for it . it will change you , but stay strong and it will change you for the right reasons , you;ll look back at some point and see her for what she really is , and realize that shes done you a big favour.

keep it together mate , doesn't matter what you do , she thinks she can do what she wants , let her. steer your own ship , go and see your gp , talk to him (stress can fuck you up so fill him in on whats going on so he can keep an eye on you health wise , you might think thats daft but your boys need you , pleaase stay strong and don't bottle it up , things will get better , and although it feels the opposite , you'll come out the other side
and be happy.

good luck blue.

that's a cracking post and I think will be a great help to danny.
you are a better man than me.

 

[Pigeonho]

my mrs did this when our kids were 2 , 4 & 6 , it took 4 years to get to get my head together. i made a decision straight away to stay amicable , and that meant me eating shit and smiling through it , even though inside i was ready to kill. those around me were waiting for me to snap too but i knew this would cost me everything including my beautiful children. even though i was having some very dark thoughts , and pretty much in despair. over the years i had bought rental properties ( before we got together) and built up a good business , i consulted two solicitors , they both said the same , she gets the house , kids , half of any assets & business , i pay any debts /mortgage/bills as she has custody and can't work. (bedsit loomed , unfuckingbelievable)
i cashed all in except the marital home , didn't go to work for 18 months and instead looked after my kids while she was out partying and pissing it up the wall , bought her a gaf she liked , sold it when she was bored with it and bought her one round the corner from me.
we now share custody , it's still amicable (and easier to be so) , i have lost a lot of material things but i now realize that they mean nothing.
my relationship with my kids is nothing less than an unbreakable bond , i look at her now
and although i'll always have feelings for her i know i could never trust her again ( i watch her lie her way through life every fucking day)

HER dad said to me at the beginning of the break up "how much do you think divorce will cost you ?" , i replied what ii thought (in monetary terms) , and he replied "you'll look back in 5 years and think that was cheap if it had have been double. and he was right.
as you state mate , it's not about the money , it;s all about you children and how they are affected , you do what you think is best for them and you , wear your hard hat cos she will throw shit at you along the way , especially when she comes crawling back and you knock her back ( you'll probably rattle her a couple of times along the way , i did , but i thought if everyone else was then i was too)
you'll come out of it at some point and be stronger and feel better for it . it will change you , but stay strong and it will change you for the right reasons , you;ll look back at some point and see her for what she really is , and realize that shes done you a big favour.

keep it together mate , doesn't matter what you do , she thinks she can do what she wants , let her. steer your own ship , go and see your gp , talk to him (stress can fuck you up so fill him in on whats going on so he can keep an eye on you health wise , you might think thats daft but your boys need you , pleaase stay strong and don't bottle it up , things will get better , and although it feels the opposite , you'll come out the other side
and be happy.

good luck blue.

that's a cracking post and I think will be a great help to danny.
you are a better man than me.

Beat me to it.

 

[bgblue]

my mrs did this when our kids were 2 , 4 & 6 , it took 4 years to get to get my head together. i made a decision straight away to stay amicable , and that meant me eating shit and smiling through it , even though inside i was ready to kill. those around me were waiting for me to snap too but i knew this would cost me everything including my beautiful children. even though i was having some very dark thoughts , and pretty much in despair. over the years i had bought rental properties ( before we got together) and built up a good business , i consulted two solicitors , they both said the same , she gets the house , kids , half of any assets & business , i pay any debts /mortgage/bills as she has custody and can't work. (bedsit loomed , unfuckingbelievable)
i cashed all in except the marital home , didn't go to work for 18 months and instead looked after my kids while she was out partying and pissing it up the wall , bought her a gaf she liked , sold it when she was bored with it and bought her one round the corner from me.
we now share custody , it's still amicable (and easier to be so) , i have lost a lot of material things but i now realize that they mean nothing.
my relationship with my kids is nothing less than an unbreakable bond , i look at her now
and although i'll always have feelings for her i know i could never trust her again ( i watch her lie her way through life every fucking day)

HER dad said to me at the beginning of the break up "how much do you think divorce will cost you ?" , i replied what ii thought (in monetary terms) , and he replied "you'll look back in 5 years and think that was cheap if it had have been double. and he was right.
as you state mate , it's not about the money , it;s all about you children and how they are affected , you do what you think is best for them and you , wear your hard hat cos she will throw shit at you along the way , especially when she comes crawling back and you knock her back ( you'll probably rattle her a couple of times along the way , i did , but i thought if everyone else was then i was too)
you'll come out of it at some point and be stronger and feel better for it . it will change you , but stay strong and it will change you for the right reasons , you;ll look back at some point and see her for what she really is , and realize that shes done you a big favour.

keep it together mate , doesn't matter what you do , she thinks she can do what she wants , let her. steer your own ship , go and see your gp , talk to him (stress can fuck you up so fill him in on whats going on so he can keep an eye on you health wise , you might think thats daft but your boys need you , pleaase stay strong and don't bottle it up , things will get better , and although it feels the opposite , you'll come out the other side
and be happy.

good luck blue.

that's a cracking post and I think will be a great help to danny.
you are a better man than me.

And me. Think I'd of fucking killed her :(

 

[Blueboy Danny]

my mrs did this when our kids were 2 , 4 & 6 , it took 4 years to get to get my head together. i made a decision straight away to stay amicable , and that meant me eating shit and smiling through it , even though inside i was ready to kill. those around me were waiting for me to snap too but i knew this would cost me everything including my beautiful children. even though i was having some very dark thoughts , and pretty much in despair. over the years i had bought rental properties ( before we got together) and built up a good business , i consulted two solicitors , they both said the same , she gets the house , kids , half of any assets & business , i pay any debts /mortgage/bills as she has custody and can't work. (bedsit loomed , unfuckingbelievable)
i cashed all in except the marital home , didn't go to work for 18 months and instead looked after my kids while she was out partying and pissing it up the wall , bought her a gaf she liked , sold it when she was bored with it and bought her one round the corner from me.
we now share custody , it's still amicable (and easier to be so) , i have lost a lot of material things but i now realize that they mean nothing.
my relationship with my kids is nothing less than an unbreakable bond , i look at her now
and although i'll always have feelings for her i know i could never trust her again ( i watch her lie her way through life every fucking day)

HER dad said to me at the beginning of the break up "how much do you think divorce will cost you ?" , i replied what ii thought (in monetary terms) , and he replied "you'll look back in 5 years and think that was cheap if it had have been double. and he was right.
as you state mate , it's not about the money , it;s all about you children and how they are affected , you do what you think is best for them and you , wear your hard hat cos she will throw shit at you along the way , especially when she comes crawling back and you knock her back ( you'll probably rattle her a couple of times along the way , i did , but i thought if everyone else was then i was too)
you'll come out of it at some point and be stronger and feel better for it . it will change you , but stay strong and it will change you for the right reasons , you;ll look back at some point and see her for what she really is , and realize that shes done you a big favour.

keep it together mate , doesn't matter what you do , she thinks she can do what she wants , let her. steer your own ship , go and see your gp , talk to him (stress can fuck you up so fill him in on whats going on so he can keep an eye on you health wise , you might think thats daft but your boys need you , pleaase stay strong and don't bottle it up , things will get better , and although it feels the opposite , you'll come out the other side
and be happy.

good luck blue.

that's a cracking post and I think will be a great help to danny.
you are a better man than me.

Thanks man, sounds like a fair approximation of how things will probably go for me, probably the best I can hope for.