worst excuses for being late

[crizack]

i once worked with a lad who used these belters on the manager.

1 - i woke up and there was a chicken in my lads bedroom so i had to try and catch it.

2. i pulled up to get petrol but i couldnt get the cap off because my hands were too moisturised so i had to ring my girlfriend to come and do it for me.

3. i was dreaming that i was at work and so i didnt wake up.


i swear on my sons life, he want even taking the piss, he thought these would be good. Hes still working there aswell.

 

[simmers]

i once worked with a lad who used these belters on the manager.

1 - i woke up and there was a chicken in my lads bedroom so i had to try and catch it.

2. i pulled up to get petrol but i couldnt get the cap off because my hands were too moisturised so i had to ring my girlfriend to come and do it for me.

3. i was dreaming that i was at work and so i didnt wake up.


i swear on my sons life, he want even taking the piss, he thought these would be good. Hes still working there aswell.

I'd still have him working for me just for more of these belters!

 

[Txiki Vimto]

Haha classic. Pmsl about his hands being 'too moisturised' haha.

 

[paphos-mcfc]

Funny as. I'd have him come in late every day.

'Sorry I'm late boss, but the alignment of Venus with the tropic of cancer gave me a right banging fucking headache, it caused double vision and I had to wait for the alignment to pass.

 

[Dumbgecko12]

the best i have heard was "sorry boss i was abducted by aliens and lost track of time!"

at uni i used the excuse of "im sorry sir but i fell out of bed and knocked myself out" kinda plausable but still...

 

[BackofJeanette]

A lad I once employed;

Sorry I'm late but I had to go to the hozzie with me tart while she got rid of the kid!

Cnut!!

(I fcuked him off the next week)

 

[Mikem93]

Me and my mates used to come out with some random ones when we were late for school, it was almost every day and became a sort of running joke.

I remember my mate coming out with something along the lines of

"Sorry we were late, we saw an old woman fall into a puddle so we helped her out but it was deeper than we thought and I fell in as well and got soaked through so after getting making sure the woman was ok I had to go home and get changed"

"Sorry I'm late Mike lost his shoe when walking across a field and we had to go back and find it"
)The route to school had no fields at all and to go across one would mean walking a fair distance out of our way and everyone knew that)

I've forgot most of the funniest ones tbh it was a while ago

 

[Dirty Harry]

Me and my mates used to come out with some random ones when we were late for school, it was almost every day and became a sort of running joke.

I remember my mate coming out with something along the lines of

"Sorry we were late, we saw an old woman fall into a puddle so we helped her out but it was deeper than we thought and I fell in as well and got soaked through so after getting making sure the woman was ok I had to go home and get changed"
"Sorry I'm late Mike lost his shoe when walking across a field and we had to go back and find it"
)The route to school had no fields at all and to go across one would mean walking a fair distance out of our way and everyone knew that)

I've forgot most of the funniest ones tbh it was a while ago

Have used the 'Old Lady' grift myself, but locked out and had to find a ladder to get in one of the upper floor windows for her.

Worse one was this complete 'hard on' I used to work with on the sites, always cracked on he was ' a hit with the Ladeeez' and proper 'wideboy', on weekends ( when it was time and a half and double time) he'd often stroll in late, one time he did it and was asked why he was late he replied 'would you wanna get out of bed if you had two birds in bed at home ? ' with a smug grin on his face, soon disappeared when he was told 'well f*ck off and spend the rest of the day with them, infact just f*ck off and don't ever come back'.

 

[daveduke67]

I got stopped by two PCSO's on the way here and spent ages pleading with them not to give me a fixed penalty notice.





:-p

 

[crizack]

hah!