stony said:I've got loads. When I was about 16 my mate got his own flat and I went to see him and had my first experience with weed.
I spent most of the night puking up after overdoing it with bongs, hot knives and plenty of spliffs. I had to be home for ten so I went to catch the bus outside his flat.
To say I was paranoid that people would notice I was stoned would be an understatement.
The bus stop had about 4 people waiting and as I crossed the road all I could think of was 'act normal don't panic'
I noticed that one of the people waiting was a girl about my age and she was very pretty and I sauntered over thinking 'act cool, don't panic'
She looked at me as I entered the bus shelter and I smiled at her and nonchalantly leaned onto the shelter with my hands in my pockets.
There was no glass in the window and I went straight though just like Del Boy and landed in the middle of the road.
An old woman said "Are you all right love" but she was doing her best not to laugh. The other cunts didn't even try and every fucking one of them was pissing themselves, fit girl included.
I just sort of mumbled 'I'm ok' and give it fucking legs down the road with the sound of everyone at the bus stop pissing their sides laughing ringing in my ears.
Pigeonho said:When I was 14 I got absolutely wankered, completely wankered where I couldn't stand up. It was at a mate's party and almost the entire main lot from our year was there, amongst others. Anyway I ended up on a bed, covered in sick, making silly groaning sounds and my parents being called. Because i'd been sick I had had my clothes removed, other than my boxers. My parents turned up in their Lada and had to more or less carry down the stairs whilst everyone looked on in amusement! I can say without doubt that was the most embarrassing moment of my entire life.
stony said:I've got loads. When I was about 16 my mate got his own flat and I went to see him and had my first experience with weed.
I spent most of the night puking up after overdoing it with bongs, hot knives and plenty of spliffs. I had to be home for ten so I went to catch the bus outside his flat.
To say I was paranoid that people would notice I was stoned would be an understatement.
The bus stop had about 4 people waiting and as I crossed the road all I could think of was 'act normal don't panic'
I noticed that one of the people waiting was a girl about my age and she was very pretty and I sauntered over thinking 'act cool, don't panic'
She looked at me as I entered the bus shelter and I smiled at her and nonchalantly leaned onto the shelter with my hands in my pockets.
There was no glass in the window and I went straight though just like Del Boy and landed in the middle of the road.
An old woman said "Are you all right love" but she was doing her best not to laugh. The other cunts didn't even try and every fucking one of them was pissing themselves, fit girl included.
I just sort of mumbled 'I'm ok' and give it fucking legs down the road with the sound of everyone at the bus stop pissing their sides laughing ringing in my ears.
ElanJo said:Shit my pants when I was in primary school. One of the teachers had to wipe my arse and did so with the door wide open as other kids walked by. :(
Prestwich_Blue said:There's been plenty but a few come to mind quickly.
I posted this one a few days ago on the thread about being on a TV quiz show. I was on 15-to-1 and the question was "The site of which Canadian city is named after Mount Royal, on which it stands?" The French for Mount Royal is of course Montreal but for some unearthly reason I blurted out "Quebec!". I just curl up when I watch that again. However I did win and get to the Grand Final so it wasn't fatal.
Another was walking into the departure lounge at Gatwick and there was this girl with her back to me. She was the same build, had the same hair and even the same jacket as a girl I'd worked with for quite a few years (and I did used to see her on the plane so it certainly was quite feasible she'd be there). I crept up behind her, tapped her on the shoulder and said something very insulting and this girl I'd bnever seen before in my life turned round.
When at uni, I was on the Hall of Residence committee and we were having a meeting in the chairman's room. Another guy on the committee was a rag fan with a quite high-pitched voice. I was sat on a window sill and the chairman asked if anyone was missing so I said something like "Yes, that squeaky voiced red twat." Then, from the other window sill, where I couldn't see, I heard "No I'm here".