United thread 2017/18

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The swamp dwellers seem to have improved quite a bit. They look like title contenders for the first time in ages, though it's still early days. We flattered to deceive in our first ten games last season and the season before that but not much came of it in the end. I hope something similar happens in the case of our neighbours.
 
PW said:
I'm new to BM, but would like to have my two penneth on the scum if you guys don't mind.

First and foremost the club itself is a myth in terms of it claims of organic growth and self sufficiency, who are they trying to kid. In the mid eighties to early nineties and just before the birth of the Premier League their club shop like ours sold kits and other bits of shit, the only difference being that Swales in his infinite wisdom had allowed our club shop to be owned by a family who paid a bit of rent on the actual building, with club making zero income on merchandise.

The scum however not satified with their original owner profiting from the sale of rank meat to school kids owned their shop outright and had day trips for local schools, tourists and in my case attendees of Sir Scrape Over Tout-Alots Soccer School. Now before you turn on me I won the place as a result of a swimming tournament, but what was clear even in 1986 was that they were pushing the hard sell in terms of kits and other shit. Now a lot of the kids on the soccer school were rich foreign kids who were actively encouraged to part with their cash and this to me is where the merchandising hard sell began. Organic growth, pull the other one from the outset it's vintage fan fleecing, but they're so numb they can't or won't see it.

The fans, well where do you start, as I have them in particular categories, which are as follows -

The first and most common type are the ones who attach themselves to the arrogance band wagon as it gives them a sense of belonging. They've never ever ever been within a square mile of the swamp, but profess that they "Used to go" or the other gem "I'm on the waiting list" They walk around like Liberace on Crystal meth when they win, but lose and you've more chance of Sky interviewing a Manc outside the swamp on matchday than seeing them the following week.

The second type is what I refer to as the "Why the f**k do you support them group" which is a varied collection of folk who have absolutely no link to the borough of Trafford, yet claim to be die hard fans, again despite having never been to a game. Their wardrobes are crammed with every replica shirt since 1992, along with other cheap shit Sports Direct fashionwear embroided with the rag badge. The natural enviroment for these turds is usually when us City fans go on holiday and have the misfortune of stumbling across them whilst out and about. Often quite vocal, especially when their team is on Sky TV in a pub or bar or likewise when they see a blue shirt. They are loud brash, but surprisingly thicker than a whale butty and tend to skulk of reasonably quickly when they talk to City fans as it soon becomes apparent they know sweet FA about football. It's worth bearing in mind that there are also a celebrity version of these cretins, who use their platform to talk utter gash. One such specimen in that shit bag, Eammon Holmes, who like the non-celebrity version just cannot keep his gob shut, but unfortunately to a wider audience.

The last type and these may i say are rarer than an intact hymen in Hue Heffner's Playboy Mansion. They are the Mancunian, okay the ones who live Greater Manchester that do actually go and unbelievably are able to participate in a balanced conversation void of arrogance, self entitlement and resist the necessity to belittle other fans clubs. They support their team like we do ours, but can be honest in their opinions and have a dislike for the aforementioned fans.

Finally they now have a manager who truly represents all that's wrong with that club. Moyes and Van Gaal were just comedy value and didn't have the required concieted persona that is ingrained in the fabric of the scum. Mourinho is a perfect fit and I wait patiently for him to do what he's done everywhere else and alienate the players when it goes tits uo. Special One, more Special Needs, as he is such a megalomaniac that he thinks he's bigger than football and that he can say and do what wants.

I apologise if I've bored you all to death, but I've 43 years of pent up frustration at having to listen to these gobshites through school and work and I now feel so much better for having a good old rant.
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Thicker than a whale butty ! I fucking love that
 
journolud said:
Think he is referring to us last year. Rags winning three on the spin against fodder means nothing at this stage.
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I'm new to this forum, so I wasn't sure if it was a blue being sarcastic or whether they allowed cockroaches to be members as well. If it's the latter the post probably doesn't make sense because as per 99% of the Sky92 fans, as they are two busy giving it plenty of gob they don't even know how many games they've played, or how many points you get for a win.
 
laserblue said:
What isn't so well known (because Kim Jong-Un and the rest of the rags' PR machine have suppressed it fairly successfully over the years) is that the club pestered the families of the Munich victims to donate medals, shirts and any other memorabilia to the club museum. Several of them did but were shocked when they were told that if they ever wanted to see them again they'd have to pay the entry fee to the museum. Jackie Blanchflower's family were particcularly disgusted by this especially as he was one one of the badly injured survivors who, along with his family, was evicted from his club house.
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Willie Wontie said:
Many clubs treated ex players shamefully especially those who fell on hard times. And not just players - Shankly was made very unwelcome after he left.

But united seem to have been in a class of their own.
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What you post is correct; what distinguishes united and Liverpool from every other club (with the possible exception of Arsenal) is club officials and ex-players constantly pontificating about the uniqueness of their club in terms of how it operates. How it does things the right way and acts with propriety in the course of its dealings. This, of course, is a lie, but one those clubs are more than willing to continue to propagate, for reasons of commercial expediency. This is why they are both such a fertile source for comedy at their expense. The day anyone associated with our club starts talking about the 'City way' a part of me will die inside. I would feel like someone had sold me a virus.
 
gordondaviesmoustache said:
What you post is correct; what distinguishes united and Liverpool from every other club (with the possible exception of Arsenal) is club officials and ex-players constantly pontificating about the uniqueness of their club in terms of how it operates. How it does things the right way and acts with propriety in the course of its dealings. This, of course, is a lie, but one those clubs are more than willing to continue to propagate, for reasons of commercial expediency. This is why they are both such a fertile source for comedy at their expense. The day anyone associated with our club starts talking about the 'City way' a part of me will die inside. I would feel like someone had sold me a virus.
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Ryan Briggs scrot rott?
 
Anyone know what page the GIF is of the scum fans 'celebrating' at Sunderland - the one with the dippy woman in the red cardigan - I have someone here I would like to show it to.
 
See they are the first team in the PL to name a starting 11 that cost over 400 million (v Leicester) according to the metro. and i bet thats the usual Rag transfer fees, not the correct ones with add ons, yet no one else mentions this but we have price comparisons when we play Brighton, Bournemouth etc
 
PW said:
Am I missing something, 6 out of 6 what, points, wins?
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last season start to the season 6 straight wins in the premier league and the media was saying we will walk the league and pep is the master and bring something new to the league in wing backs and open play

so let them sing and shout about there little nice run of wins but they have played nobody that should take points of them really and just like man city last season we played sunderland h stoke a west ham h united a bournmouth h swansea a so like i said nobody in the top 4 or 6 until spurs away when the wheels fell off
 
It is widely reported that they have improved and will be up at the top towards the end - what people don't seem so keen on pointing out is that they have played 3 teams who's managers(in all likelihood) will be sacked before the end of the season

If we get 90 points then there is fuck all Untied can do, we will win the league.
 
I walked into the pub last night just after the shit had finished.
Some bellend in a scum shirt said to me have u been to watch city.
I said unless I flew back how would I be in here.
I asked if he had watched that lot.
Yeah watched it in here......
I give up
 
Kasper Schmicheal has saved more penalties at the swamp than his father peter

That's 1 for kasper apparently

Also apparently, his father in his whole career as a rag only faced 3 penalties at the swamp

It's been going on for ages- the agenda!
 
United pen yesterday was a joke - Michael (I have to be certain) Oliver couldn't wait. Interesting stat that Re Kasper and penalties.
 
mcfc1632 said:
Anyone know what page the GIF is of the scum fans 'celebrating' at Sunderland - the one with the dippy woman in the red cardigan - I have someone here I would like to show it to.
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I have that framed in my hall.
 
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