What's the most drunk you've ever been?

About 16 at my dad's works party...

Had a nice meal and a few drinks then decided to minesweep as it's called these days. Realising I was hammered I thought I'd better leg it to the bog for a piss/shit/puke unfortunately, the toilets were fucking miles away from the bar and dancefloor & it also involved passing the front reception desk.

I would have made it but for a posh woman in a fur coat who had just walked in who didn't get out of my way, after both her and me trying to get out of each others space as I ran towards the bogs round the corner I hit her full on, fell on top of her and emptied the contents of my belly all over her and her coat.

Finally making the bogs I complete the treble and pass out, next thing I know I'm at home in bed.

Took me 5/6 days to feel human again.
 
Visited a mate in Uni a few years ago. Started as I meant to go on drinking from a hip flask in Asda. I do not know what happened on the night but, I woke up with blisters on my forehead having slept face down at some point on the hot water pipe in his hallway.
 
Probably the drunkest was when me and my mate drank a bottle of Croft original each, we were thirteen. Not pretty
 
When I was 17yo after an all day bender, I could not walk a yard without falling over, I fell in the road in front of an unmarked copper who fortunately decided to let me stagger off with assistance from my mate, when he let go I was on the floor again, I have absolutely no idea how I managed to get home or how long it took (usually 20 minute walk)

It was pissing down and in the morning you would have thought I had just rolled in the nearest farmers field and then a river to clean myself off a bit afterwards, clothes were so wet they actually soaked the bedroom carpet as if I had thrown 3 pints of water down, then again it may have been piss lol
 
I'd guess it was over 40 years ago and almost certainly involved vodka (amongst other culprits). All I know is that I threw up so hard I burst a blood vessel in my throat.
 
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