The 115 alleged rules we have broken - according to know nowts

(rule 113) paragraph 47, subsection D. Any football club having the temerity to finish above Arsenal, Liverpool and Manchester United in more than one consecutive season, will find themselves on the end of a witch hunt aimed at destroying said club.

Paragraph 47, subsection D. Was written in invisible ink, until such time it became relevant.
 
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Rule 112, subsection 49a: Loitering with intent to use a pedestrian crossing.
Rule 97: Smelling of foreign food.
Rule 96: Walking on the cracks in the pavement.
Rule 76, subsection 3, paragraph 4: Possession of curly black hair and thick lips.
 
Rule 114...causing an unexpected and unprecedented fire drill in the vicinity of Old Trafford on several occasions , furthermore leading to a stampede for trains , planes and automobiles from the greater Manchester area to London , Ireland and various rag infested towns throughout the UK..
 

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