United Thread - 2023/24

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Game kicked off at 4am so recorded it and just watched it back.

Fuck me I’ve never seen Brentford dominate any team in the league to the extent they did last night. United are absolutely fucking gash and Mainoo was totally invisible once the commentators stopped mentioning him every 10 seconds.
 
My guess is one of them is a trainee barber and cuts all their hair for free or a discount. Unfortunately he's only learned one style of cut so far, which is why they all have shit hairstyles.
1 of them is hiding his haircut with a goggle hood. He obviously isn’t happy with his hair cut.
 
a player is in an offside position if any of their body parts, except the hands and arms, are in the opponents' half of the pitch, and closer to the opponents' goal line than both the ball and the second-last opponent (the last opponent is usually, but not necessarily, the goalkeeper).[1]

Video Assistant Referee​

Brentford 0-0 Man Utd
It looks initially on the replay as though Ivan Toney's hand is offside but the lines are needed to confirm it. No goal.




So how can he be offside for a hand which you can't score from?
No corruption here, no
Because it turned out that it was his knee rather than his hand and it was about a foot off.

Shockingly, the intern writing the minute by minute updates isn’t the great oracle of decision making.
 
As soon as I saw that McThug and Mainoo was the midfield I knew they were going to struggle. The midfield has been there downfall all season, add in Casemiro, Mount, Eriksson, they are all wank. Ten Bob is definitely getting the chop in the summer.
No no no, you must have missed the memo about Mainoo being the greatest DM to have ever walked the earth... that's why they've conceded over 100 shots in their last 4 games with this colossus dominating midfield.
 
I didn’t even know these irrelevant lot were playing last night. Just put MOTD on and was pleasantly amused at the outcome. Wish they’d have panned onto Ten Hag after the equaliser though!
 
As soon as I saw that McThug and Mainoo was the midfield I knew they were going to struggle. The midfield has been there downfall all season, add in Casemiro, Mount, Eriksson, they are all wank. Ten Bob is definitely getting the chop in the summer.

The opinion that Mainoo is ready is hilarious. Ive noticed Mainoo being lost in so many games & be lorded for making a few nice passes. It’s embarrassing but desperate for them to have a star that they believed it & again got him in the England team.
 
How Brentford didn't win that I'll never know. United are turgid. Will it improve under Southgate? Maybe, can see it now...

"Confusion today at Old Trafford as Gareth Southgate named his first very United line up, including three Manchester City players.

Officials at City were keen to point out that Walker, Foden and Stones were still in fact contracted to them, but with the FA expected to intervene on Southgate's behalf there is every chance we could see a new look United come 3 o'clock.

The FA, known to have pledged to make the Premier League more competitive after City's fourth title in a row, will enact a repeat of history by insisting that City surrender some of their best players to appease their slapped-arse red neighbours."
 
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