United Thread | 2024/25

[The Stockport Iniesta]

I counted diving for 2 pen's, I might have missed a few though.

Cheating raggy cunts.

 

[Manc baggie]

FFS, Just the 15 out of the first 20 ‘articles’ in the daily mail about utd tonight. One game in & the wankfest is in full swing.

 

[SebastianBlue]

FFS, Just the 15 out of the first 20 ‘articles’ in the daily mail about utd tonight. One game in & the wankfest is in full swing.

You know, I say this is good.

The higher they raise them, the more glorious the inevitable fall.

 

[Fat Larrys Band]

Just looked at the tables... rags top of the league, I cannot remember the last time I saw that.

Luckily when I look tomorrow, everything will be back to normal and the rag bastards will be plummeting down the table!!!

 

[chaddblue]

They were shite and any rag who says they weren’t is a liar

 

[The Stockport Iniesta]

Just looked at the tables... rags top of the league, I cannot remember the last time I saw that.

Luckily when I look tomorrow, everything will be back to normal and the rag bastards will be plummeting down the table!!!

Give it a few weeks and the cunts will be in crisis again.

 

[FogBlueInSanFran]

I would mate but I'd put it over two posts and people would probably think I was insane with the ranting.

I assure you we would not. It is effectively impossible to overstate how much we would enjoy it.

 

[Silva 83]

I assure you we would not. It is effectively impossible to overstate how much we would enjoy it.

I wrote something up the other day in word processor document while waiting for my account to be approved. It was 1,400 words. It could have been longer than that as I could have written 5 times as much.

To be fair, I didn't really cover their history (I am well-versed in some of it but not as much as the guys and girls on here) or their dickhead ex-players - it was mostly about the failure of many of their hyped up transfer signings in the last few years.

I might paste it in at some point.

 

[deegee33]

I would mate but I'd put it over two posts and people would probably think I was insane with the ranting.

How could you possibly be considered insane due to a rant regarding your distaste of the rags.
Use as many posts as you want, only two is considered League 1 level here on Bluemoon.

 

[Silva 83]

How could you possibly be considered insane due to a rant regarding your distaste of the rags.
Use as many posts as you want, only two is considered League 1 level here on Bluemoon.

Fair enough. Not sure I have the stamina for a 7,000 word dissertation. I could do that if I really wanted to and spent some time on it, polishing it etc, but it's maybe a bit too much effort.

So far I have 1,500 odd words on them. Mostly about their recent transfer activity and talking a bit about their stupid fans' lack of self-esteem and need for approval. I haven't really delved into their history, cuntish ex-players, how horrible the likes of Ferguson, Martin Edwards, Ratcliffe et al are. No mention of John Henry Davies or James Gibson yet either.

Maybe I can expand it a little.

 

[blueju]

I counted diving for 2 pen's, I might have missed a few though.

Cheating raggy cunts.

Igor dived twice on the edge of the box and was waved away twice, that’s two yellows.

 

[blueju]

My favourite part of the NBC commentary after the final whistle was them saying that they commentated on that opener last year and, although United won, everyone could see something wasn’t quite right. But this time—THIS TIME—they played with more control and confidence, and “look a real side to challenge this year”.

I nearly spit out the water I was drinking through my nose.

They get so much global spin it is a wonder that time doesn’t go backwards. I am sure the new rag brass are working on that.

They were awful, as bad as Fulham, two really bad teams hoping for a scrappy winner. Looked like two relegation battlers to me.

 

[I'm With Stupid]

Ah the rags get a stuffy 1-0 win at home in the last few minutes of the game despite being shit (I didn't watch it, I'm just assuming). Nice to see normal service is resumed.

 

[dennishasdoneit]

View attachment 128466

Joshua deluded..
" it's a great team ".....Great teams don't finish 8th in the top league.
" we want to achieve something great ".......Joshua is now accepting they haven't done anything yet....so how can they be great ?
What a load of rubbish.

 

[Plays By Sense Of Smell]

Fair enough. Not sure I have the stamina for a 7,000 word dissertation. I could do that if I really wanted to and spent some time on it, polishing it etc, but it's maybe a bit too much effort.

So far I have 1,500 odd words on them. Mostly about their recent transfer activity and talking a bit about their stupid fans' lack of self-esteem and need for approval. I haven't really delved into their history, cuntish ex-players, how horrible the likes of Ferguson, Martin Edwards, Ratcliffe et al are. No mention of John Henry Davies or James Gibson yet either.

Maybe I can expand it a little.

Don't hold back; trust me, we're all as eager as one another for this potential sniff-fest to end. x

 

[Silva 83]

Part 1

Let’s take just the last few years.

In summer of 2021, they signed Ronaldo, Varane and Sancho. Their biggest ever legend Ronaldo, they said. Those three were said by intellectual titan Gary Neville to be the missing piece of the puzzle to make them title winners (okay, Kane over Ronaldo, but it’s a similar premise).

The result? Varane does okay when he plays, but it’s nowhere near the Real Madrid version and the lad spends more time on the treatment table than on the pitch for the next three seasons. Ronaldo scores here and there but as expected he is terrible in link-up, passing and generally stalks the box like a poacher. Makes them overall a worse team while boosting his stats. He ends up going on a psychotic rant in an interview with Piers Morgan, then leaving the club. Now there is bad blood between he and many of the United fans.

As for Sancho? Well, they kept talking and producing their amateur tactician youtube videos about him. Apparently he was going to be one of the best wingers in the world. But he’s done absolutely fuck all and been an absolute failure.

In the summer of 2022, they signed Casemiro. Surely it was doomed to failure? No! said their fans. This was a multiple CL winner, he must be vastly superior to Rodri!

He was 30 years old and signed for a huge fee. At the start, he had several quite good months to be fair, but unlike at Real Madrid the dirty hacking **** sometimes received the yellow and red cards he deserved.

Towards the end of the first season, Casemiro started to look leggy. He came back in after the summer overweight and for all of last season looked like a past-it donkey who couldn’t control a ball or pass water (passing has never been his forte, to be fair) and they’re still stuck with the clown now.

Two winters ago, they get Weghorst on loan. He was going to come in and have great all-round play, press brilliantly and be a facilitator for the others, as well as scoring a fair few goals himself.

The result? He looked like an absolute calamity, struggled to control a ball and barely scored. Option to buy not taken up.

Last summer, Onana comes in as first-choice goalkeeper. We are treated to endless videos about how ‘transformative’ a goalkeeper he is and how his distribution is going to make Man United a machine.

The result? He looks like an absolute clown, makes mistakes galore, plays a massive part in them being knocked out of the CL, lets easy shots trickle past him. As for his famed ‘distribution’? I watched every game of theirs but one while supporting the opposition last season and almost every long pass went either to said opposition or straight into touch. And the stats back me on that too.

Also last season, Amrabat was loaned in. Like Onana, he was going to transform United. He was going to be the combative and high-pressing and passing midfielder they needed to finally make the jump from 3rd to 1st. This was all based on the very risky logic that he looked good in the World Cup for Morocco.

The result? He is mediocrity personified the entire season, makes mistakes, looks poor tactically and is generally a complete failure. Now back at his parent club, Fiorentina.

 

[Silva 83]

Post 2 (continued)

Mason Mount was going to be a pressing machine. The result? Injured most of the campaign, invisible when he did play, and the complete nothing player most sensible people know he is.

Also last season, Rashford is coming off his so-called ‘best ever campaign’. Their fans are crowing about a world-class, Player of the Season year coming up. We all know how that worked out.

Fast forward to the present. We are being treated to such pearls of wisdom as ‘de Ligt must be world class because Bayern fans wanted to keep him’ and endless clueless wannabe tacticians’ Youtube videos about the ‘number 9.5, not 9 or 10, get it right’ Joshua Zirkzee. Or how nothing player Burnley lad Sander Berge – a fella they wouldn’t have recognised in the street three weeks ago – is the answer to all of their problems as they’ve suddenly been linked to him.

Let’s not get too much into prior to 2021. 85m man Pogba and the guys who were gonna ‘unlock’ him, Donny Van de Beek the ‘80 million player they’re getting for 40 million’ or Harry ‘the potential best CB in the league’ Maguire for 80m. Or ‘we have sorted our right wing for the next decade’ (after one good game) Daniel James. Yes, I saw some of them say that.

Right now, they’re also clinging on to the FA Cup Final against City. A game they got lucky in with a mistake and then admittedly good second goal, and then defended their own box for an hour. This also proves they don’t understand that cup football is completely different to league football. That trophy has zero bearing on their projected league performance this season.

Fact is, their fans are generally delusional. We see it on their sites, where any dose of realism is derided as ‘negativity’ – when you have been as bad as they have for so long, it isn’t negative, it’s honest.

They’re so desperate to be back that they indulge in severe coping strategies and pop deludamol pills. And most of their fans are such thick lemmings that they believe the United propaganda in the sports media. As recently as the last few days with them drooling over an empty puff piece (not even written by him personally) from Omar Berrada (the same guy who slagged United when he was at Man City) about how they’re such a huge club, and how his father used to tell him stories of Munich and George Best (always an easy way to get United fans onside – mention Munich or Best or Charlton or Duncan Edwards). Like any of that has fucking anything do with his job, or how they will perform this season. Such an easily manipulated fanbase. Walk the walk, don’t talk the talk.

The thing with them is they need these players to be good, because their entire self-esteem is intertwined with United as a club. Most of them have no concrete achievements in their own life, and have latched onto United at some point in the last 60 years in an attempt to wallow in some reflected glory. They figured it was a safe bet. However, now that United have fallen apart over the last decade, they’re going insane as they can’t handle not having that safety net for their self-esteem. Many of their lives were mediocre and lacked fulfilment – but they could always rely on United winning the league. They don’t have that comfort blanket now, and that’s why they go so mad at defeats. It’s why they spin everything and everyone linked to them as the biggest and best ever – because of their extreme insecurity and need to win. The biggest glory-hunters on the planet.

They never learn, and it is doomed to failure yet again. Bearing in mind all of the above errors (and it’s far from exhaustive), why would you EVER listen to anything their fans or media cheerleaders say? They have been proved wrong REPEATEDLY. Their fans are clearly indoctrinated by the sycophancy in the press.

Don’t even get me started on Ferguson, their horrible ex-players (many of which talk tripe in a media space that enables them to do so), horrible tossers like Martin Edwards and Jim Ratcliffe.

The truth is they’re finished, and this ‘new era’ is all smoke and mirrors and will end in tears. Every season they talk about being ‘in transition’ and ‘making preparations to challenge in a few years’. But it never happens. While Pep is at City, they won’t challenge.

Also, something often overlooked, but one of their biggest problems is counter-attacking is built into the culture of their club. They can’t play controlling, dominant, possession football as the best teams do now. That’s not in their club’s ethos or capability. Even dating back to Ferguson’s time they played smack it long or up the wings, fire crosses in the box, 100mph chaos ball. They haven’t moved with the times on the pitch. Hence, they will naturally have a ceiling as to how many games they can win and how many points they can accrue, and consequently how many trophies they can muster.

End of story.

 

[I'm With Stupid]

Fast forward to the present. We are being treated to such pearls of wisdom as ‘de Ligt must be world class because Bayern fans wanted to keep him’ and endless clueless wannabe tacticians’ Youtube videos about the ‘number 9.5, not 9 or 10, get it right’ Joshua Zirkzee. Or how nothing player Burnley lad Sander Berge – a fella they wouldn’t have recognised in the street three weeks ago – is the answer to all of their problems as they’ve suddenly been linked to him.

Haha, a 9.5. We can't call him a 9 or people might look at how many goals he scores, and we can't call him a 10, otherwise people might look at how many assists he gets.

 

[Silva 83]

Haha, a 9.5. We can't call him a 9 or people might look at how many goals he scores, and we can't call him a 10, otherwise people might look at how many assists he gets.

Yes, the guy is deluded and clearly sees himself as both a world-class playmaker or assist maker and a world-class goalscorer, when he is neither.

 

[Bluekiwi]

Do the rags ALWAYS get the opening game of the season so their deluded followers can pin the league table (available on ESPN Soccernet) on their bedroom wall showing them TOP.