Barton (merged)

[Prestwich_Blue]

PMSL at this in the Daily Telegraph:

Joey Barton: philosophical football advice
In our collected extracts from his new philosophical treatise Conversations with Myself and Others, the prolific Tweetist and regular quoter of Orwell, Nietzsche and Virgil has some words of advice for footballing figures of the day.

Carlos Tévez
I called Carlos up when I saw his latest transfer request. Sympathetic, like. I told him I knew how hard it was having to play for Manchester City. And to remind him that Proust said: “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but seeing with new eyes.” He said that was exactly why he needs to leave: he’s demanded that Man City give him an improved contract and pay for him to have his eyes replaced with lasers. They refused. Total joke. I said in that case, they’ve left you no choice pal. It’s a short career and you have to look after yourself.

Mario Balotelli
Worried for Mario after his latest run-in with the powers-that-be. Just because he wants to do a bit of showboating, or tell the press that he’d rather play for another club, or dress up in t-shirt with guns and blood on it, or nearly strangle himself trying to put a bib on, people think they have the right to have a go? I told him to remember what Johann Wolfgang von Goethe said: “The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything.” He texted back: “Leave me alone.” Top banter.

Arsène Wenger
I feel for Arsène, trying to play football his way in the face of all the evidence. I told him his team puts me in mind of Norman Mailer saying: “There is no greater impotence in all the world like knowing you are right and that the wave of the world is wrong, yet the wave crashes upon you.” He can hit surprisingly hard for an old French guy.

Sam Allardyce
I know some people think that Sam’s a bit old fashioned, long ball merchant, all about pace and power and no skill. There’s more to him than that, though; and I told him so one morning when I ran into him outside the butcher’s. It’s like Alfred A Montapert said: “Do not confuse motion and progress. A rocking horse keeps moving but does not make any progress.” He said: “Are you saying this Rocking Horse lad’s got a good engine? How is he in the air? Can he give the ball a bloody good thump?”

Alan Pardew
I thought I’d try to clear the air with Pardew so I texted him something I’d read by Jawaharlal Nehru: “Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you is determinism; the way you play it is free will.” Now he’s accusing me of trying to start a gambling culture at the club and they’re using it as an excuse to drum me out of there. But I know the real truth. Like Nietzsche said: “The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also to hate his friends.” I reckon I’m about half-way there.

 

[Manx Blue]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQVNEe07ajU[/youtube]

:D

If we had an option between Barton and a French midfielder on 25 Llama beans a week, I'd rather the Frenchman every day of that week, and twice on Sundays.

We do not need the scouse fucktard.

 

[gordonk]

Do not touch with barge pole! Its taken Bobby ages to get rid of all the trouble makers,why bring in the biggest one now.

 

[B\connellblue]

Joseph had a horse running in the 2.20 at yarmouth called"my body is a cage". It was beaten a short head at 8/1. The winning owners made good their escape before the presentation.

 

[PistonBlue]

Do not touch with barge pole! Its taken Bobby ages to get rid of all the trouble makers,why bring in the biggest one now.

Seconded

 

[Bill]

Do not touch with barge pole! Its taken Bobby ages to get rid of all the trouble makers,why bring in the biggest one now.

Seconded

on a free? you would'nt have him? and if nige does one over this contract row? not many better than joey at getting stuck in, at any price.

 

[1.618034]

Do not touch with barge pole! Its taken Bobby ages to get rid of all the trouble makers,why bring in the biggest one now.

Seconded

on a free? you would'nt have him? and if nige does one over this contract row? not many better than joey at getting stuck in, at any price.

Barton isn't a DM. Nige isn't going to "do one".

But that's hardly the point... Been there done that. No way he'll be coming back to City, especially now.

But if I were in that chasing group of clubs I'd seriously look at him as an option.

 

[zandvoort blue]

He will see out the last 12 months at NUFC as nobody with any sense would go anywhere near offering him a contract elsewhere.
For those who think Kia Joorabchian is the biggest leech and parasite in the game, they have surely not come across Barton`s agent, the infamous Willie McKay.

 

[Tez Tosterone]

All this stuff about Barton quoting existential philosophers and renaissance poets makes me suspicious that he may be first individual on Twitter to have a ghost writer posting the tweets.

 

[LoveCity]

This better be bollox.

Pulis is also interested in Newcastle's Joey Barton but although he is a free transfer he is also looking for wages of near £70,000.

Manchester United, Arsenal, Tottenham and Manchester City are all interested in Barton but the 28-year-old is keen to play regular football.