Bereavement

[Nebuchadnezzar]

Its threads like this that really make me like Bluemoon as an online community. Regardless of different views or opinions on other threads, I believe we'll always stick up for each other and rally around when needed. Quite comforting in a way. Thoughts to all that have shared their losses in this thread.

 

[PALESTINIAN HEARTED MANC]

Years ago I have lost my brother (he was my hero amf closest to me ) in an accident just days before his engagement. Then my dad few years back. Constantly feel terrified of losing loved ones ( I don't think I ever said that to anyone or thought of speaking it out ). Learnt to value and have the best out of every moment being around those we love before its too late :-(

 

[peoffrey]

Sam and Sue in such short spaces of each other were a real shock. Both incredible characters too.

I also knew Danny Lewis well (Billy Big Spuds) and had to break his passing to friends on Facebook. He’d been suffering for a year but news had dried up. He was the first non-family member I leaked tears over.

Then there’s Ste more recently too.

 

[worsleyweb]

Just found out today a real good friend of mine who has cancer has been told they are not doing anymore chemo as it is not working.

It has absolutely knocked me for six. Spent all day in a complete daze.

So bloody unfair.

 

[andyhinch]

Lost my mum and dad when I was quite young and more friends than I like to think of, always went back to work the next day, life goes on, shit isn't it.

 

[peoffrey]

Don’t feel embarrassed about taking time off to grieve. A girl from my old social circle in London passed away in March last year in unexpected circumstances. I contacted work to advise and they asked me to come in when I was ready. Colleagues took time to check I was ok when I returned.

 

[Nebuchadnezzar]

Sam and Sue in such short spaces of each other were a real shock. Both incredible characters too.

I also knew Danny Lewis well (Billy Big Spuds) and had to break his passing to friends on Facebook. He’d been suffering for a year but news had dried up. He was the first non-family member I leaked tears over.

Then there’s Ste more recently too.

I never knew any of these posters personally and believe Sam and Sue might have been a bit before my time on Bluemoon. I was however around when Ste was, and there was something about him that always caught my attention. A real enigma and had plenty of interesting things to say. I was genuinely only wondering about him the day before Ric posted the news on here about him. It was probably the first time i've felt a bit of a sense of loss for someone I only knew online.

 

[Blue Maverick]

It’s weird the other day on Facebook many posts about 100 years of the RAF of which I served, then someone posted two pictures of people I knew who’d passed away, now one lad was in 2009 and he basically drank his liver out and died, that was always on the cards but still a shock when I found out, he was a top bloke. The second picture was of a guy who I’d genuinely forgot about, he took his own life back in the early 90s (all over a fucking woman), it stopped me in my tracks, it’s the only picture I’ve ever seen of him (no,camera phones back then) I genuinely felt so sad even after all this time, what a waste:(

 

[PinkFinal]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

 

[BridgyDids]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Sorry for your loss pal

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Sorry for your loss, mate. I lost my grandma on Tuesday. There’s no textbook way of dealing with grief and loss. Just do what you need to do, feel what you need to feel and use your support systems.

It’s okay to cry.
It’s okay to laugh, when you think of one of his quirks.
Sometimes you do both, and that’s okay too.

It’s incredible how much energy it saps from you. I’ve been drained for days.

Take care of yourself too. Chat when you need to. I’m sure there are loads on here that would listen to you in PMs, should you want or need to do that, me included.

 

[1961_vintage]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago.

So sorry for your loss. There really are no words that are even remotely adequate.

My only advice I would give you is to be there right now in that moment, feeling and absorbing every aspect of your Dad and your life together and to stay there for as long as you want to. You will carry them in your heart for the rest of your life.

 

[ob]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Sorry for your loss mate

 

[BlueHammer85]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Sorry for your loss.
Lost my dad 2 nights ago.
It’s a very strange surreal experience isn’t it and hits me in waves.
Guess time will make it easier.

 

[Millwallawayveteran1988]

Sorry for your loss.
Lost my dad 2 nights ago.
It’s a very strange surreal experience isn’t it and hits me in waves.
Guess time will make it easier.

Condolences for your loss.

 

[Millwallawayveteran1988]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Condolences for your loss.

 

[Pince]

When my Mum died, although it was expected, I felt as though someone had clouted me across the head with a plank of wood.
Stay strong, Blue, please stay strong….

 

[DunfermlineBlue]

It’s a cliche but the only thing that really helps is time.

 

[PinkFinal]

Sorry for your loss.
Lost my dad 2 nights ago.
It’s a very strange surreal experience isn’t it and hits me in waves.
Guess time will make it easier.

Big hugs mate.

I have a million thoughts in my head.
All the silly arguments, things that should have been said that weren't.
A few days ago before the sudden downturn he said to me 'I don't know what I'd do without you' which I suppose was his way of thanking me for everything.
Maybe he knew his time was limited.
I'm just glad that although it wasn't an 'I love you' relationship he was able to see my deep love for him through my actions.
In his delirium at the end when he couldn't speak he rubbed my hand hard when he didn't seem capable of anything at all . I'll.never forget this.

 

[i kne albert davy]

Lost my dad early hours this morning. He was 84 and a cantankerous rag.

I'm absolutely overcome with grief. I'm in his house now among all his things and clothes he was using just 4 days ago. Even the skin cream I used to help him put on occasionally. I know it's less than 24 hours but the pain is so immense I don't know how I'm going to get over this.
I was of course very upset when my mum died but this is on another level. One I didn't know existed.
Anyone going through this has my sympathy
I thankfully have my support systems , relatives , neighbours etc who will help with the nightmare world of morgues death certificates and funeral arrangements.

Lost mine nearly 23 years ago now like you say going into the house all his stuff still there coats hats etc made everything at the time seem pointless, his funeral was heartbreaking. Still miss him for advice and stuff but times a great healer it does get better. Mine was a blue so I thank him for that on a regular basis.