Best put downs....

[quincunx]

one young lad on the tram to another young lad who had just insulted him...

"i've got worse friends than you."

 

[Fred_Quimby]

A few years ago I was on a packed tube; a guy gave his seat for a lady - she said 'I hope you didn't give me your seat because I am a lady' he said 'no I gave it up because I am a gentleman'.

 

[mancity2012_eamo]

A few years ago I was on a packed tube; a guy gave his seat for a lady - she said 'I hope you didn't give me your seat because I am a lady' he said 'no I gave it up because I am a gentleman'.

That put her in her place.

 

[Stockton Heath Blue]

“I’d Drink [Poison]”​

Lady Astor: “If I were married to you, I’d put poison in your coffee.”

Reply: “If I were married to you, I’d drink it.”

Another Churchill insult.

 

[gloryhuntersince85]

my rag supporting mate was at the swamp a few years ago when they played the Dippers, he said there was a gobshite who wouldn't shut up hurling insults at every dipper player, rags scored the gobshite stood up shouting abuse at dipper fans, went quiet when dippers equalised but as rags made it 2-1 he was up again " Yes , its better than sex this" he shouted until my mate said "well you must be doing it wrong!" to the point most of the block started laughing and the gobshite sat down in silence

 

[Always Ali]

You're so fucking dense, light actually bends around you

 

[Mr Fraser]

Bessie Braddock: ‘Winston, you are drunk!’

Churchill: ‘Bessie, my dear, you are ugly. But, tomorrow, I shall be sober’

My first thought when I saw thread title

 

[Bill Walker]

Don’t try to be clever, it doesn’t suit you.

I said that to Misty but he didn’t understand

He did really, but his acting skills are very highly developed.

He just enjoys fucking with us.

 

[Deleted member 77198]

Your Dad should have pulled out.

 

[Kinkybyname]

if I could afford the wood, I'd have your fucking mouth boarded up