Let’s open the books for parade betting:
1) First player to drop a trophy Jack Grealish
2) Number of times Jack almost falls off the bus 10
3) Number of times Rodri saves Jack from falling off the bus 6
4) First player to lift “Fergie RIP” sign Johnny Stones he hates United
5) Most cans/bottles downed by a player whilst on route to the stage Jack Grealish
6) First player to catch a bra from the crowd Jack Grealish
7) Minute of the journey Pep lights a cigar 3
8) Does Sergio appear on the bus yes at 93.20
9) How many photos taken by rags at 09:00 this morning posted on Twitter with the caption “some parade, where is everyone #Emptihad #NoFans” Too fucking many
10) Do Haaland or Jack let their hair down Jack wont have any hair left after falling from the bus
Place your bets now.