Gary Neville

It's the arrogance that is built into them at the cesspit.
Ratboy struts into the club and announces he's the new manager: the players share a puzzled look as if to say "Who the fuck are you? Roland Rat's stunt man?" And he puffs his chest out and gives them all his pathetic 'hard-man look' and replies: "Oi! I've got mates at home that could beat you up any time I want them to. Really tough guys who have been known to deliberately walk on the cracks in the pavement. One of 'em has even been known to stay up to nearly 10' O-clock at night. So be careful who you mess with." And the players roll on the floor, howling with laughter, scarcely believing what they're hearing. The changing room is filled with so much mirth and piss-taking that Ratboy wipes away a tear and runs home. His short managerial career an immensely amusing footnote in the history of time.
 

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