In 41 seasons of watching City I've never once caught the ball at a game? Saturday against Newcastle was the closest I've come when Lescott kicked the ball into the East stand and I thought here it is, my big moment has arrived, should I head it I thought as I closely followed the trajectory of the ball from Lescott's boot, maybe I'll punch it as it sailed high into the stand. Nah I'm gonna catch this fucker I decided whilst getting my body into shape, feet firmly grounded and balance poised, the pace was perfect as it sailed towards me and then in a moment it was gone, whether or not it was the wind or Joleons inability to accurately pick me out with a pinpoint hoof into the crowd I know not but the ball swerved unnervingly slightly above me and out of reach to a couple of rows behind.
My head was filled with disappointment and then suddenly the guy behind fumbles it and with my body contorted looking behind me I can once again see the ball is coming down the rows again directly at me. I'm nervous fuck I was genuinely nervous with too much time to think as a second chance to grasp that damn ball was within reach. It's here it's here screamed a voice inside my head and then some fuckers fist comes out of nowhere and punches it 4 seats to my right on the same fucking row into the safe hands of somebody else who would never know of my anguish. For the next five minutes the rows infront and behind were as giddy as fuck with tales of people touching it, punching it, feeling it and what not. All the while I sat in silence ashamedly hating all my fellow blues and their moment in the sun. BASTARDS!
So I'm still at 41years loyal service a ''Non-touch football Virgin.''